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Galactic Wonders


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Galactic Wonders


It’s not uncommon for an owner of a vehicle to come in and explain in detail how the intracepticle flinindelater has caused the gingel spring to drop into the spirozipulator. I would be taking notes right now… but my ballpoint pen melted because I had it too close to my personal atomic reactor coffee maker.


I hear these extraterrestrial explanations of car problems all the time. Sometimes they bring their buddies, a girlfriend, or maybe even a family member. I’m not surprised when there are three or more loose sprockets telling me about their rendikulators phase shifter while standing at the front counter. I guess they all show up together to make sure that all the reference information is “atmospherically” correct… or to make sure they all maintain a grip on terra firma. (Forgot their gravity boots)


The really funny part is the guy standing behind the “master of automotive technical words”. They usually have less of a clue than the guy with the anti-matter phase interrupter, but remain content in knowing their place in the universe is safe as the all knowing book of useless knowledge. They’ll stick in some info as needed … depending on the conversation at the counter.


It’s still an important part in the continuation of the space time continuum. Or, he could be there for the free beer his buddy has to offer along with a chance to finally use that obscure tool his fore fathers handed down to him years ago.


My job for the day is to fill in the small missing gaps of information that didn’t make it thru the time warp. This guy’s main goal is not to upset the balance of the universe or interrupt any high level discussions about matters involving his chance to boldly go where he has never gone before. Besides he may only get this one chance to ever try out that tool his ancestors left him before he hands it down to his offspring.


So, when these situations come up … watch the dude behind the dude… he’s the real funny one. The “Talker” is too serious to be funny; you’ll find him funny after you try to comprehend the galaxy of galactic information. These guys usual feel that they have reached a higher than needed level of intellectual understanding and are proud to show off their masculinity and technical knowhow to all, alien or any other extraterrestrials.


It’s a warp drive on the starship of auto repair… I never get tired of hearing these stories from the other side of the galaxy. It’s a break from reality to listen to these stories from so far, far away.


Anytime I’m out and about in public or at a movie, in a restaurant, visiting the Ball Park, or a store. I’m always curious to see if I can spot these wonders of the Milky Way. I tend to keep quiet and just observe from a distance. People are people and people are funny. They don’t even try to be funny… they just are. So the next time you’re out in the world at large, see if you can spot the absurdness.


Oh, they’re out there all right…just look around, then again, keep in mind… If you’re in a room full of people and you can’t find anyone that fits the description of the galactic traveler from planet wacky… check the mirror.


Because we’re all part of the same Universe.




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Well, a sci-fi fan... mmm... maybe... more often whatever looks like a good story - could be western, could be a silent movie, ..

and believe me..... you don't really want to see the world from these eyes... it ain't that pretty...

you're a real character Joe, ya make my day with your comments... thanx buddy

Live Long and Prosper ....


You must be a Si fi fan, right? I would give a week's pay to see life thru your eyes. You bring out "real-life" witht a spin that most people know may not be aware of.

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  • Have you checked out Joe's Latest Blog?

      Got your attention? Good. The truth is, there is no such thing as the perfect technician pay plan. There are countless ways to create any pay plan. I’ve heard all the claims and opinions, and to be honest, it’s getting a little frustrating. Claims that an hourly paid pay plan cannot motivate. That flat rate is the only way to truly get the most production from your technicians. And then there’s the hybrid performance-based pay plan that many claim is the best.
      At a recent industry event, a shop owner from the Midwest boasted about his flat-rate techs and insisted that this pay plan should be adopted by all shops across the country. When I informed him that in states like New York, you cannot pay flat-rate, he was shocked. “Then how do you motivate your techs” he asked me.
      I remember the day in 1986 when I hired the best technician who ever worked for me in my 41 years as an automotive shop owner. We’ll call him Hal. When Hal reviewed my pay plan for him, and the incentive bonus document, he stared at it for a minute, looked up, and said, “Joe, this looks good, but here’s what I want.” He then wrote on top of the document the weekly salary he wanted. It was a BIG number. He went on to say, “Joe, I need to take home a certain amount of money. I have a home, a wife, two kids, and my Harly Davidson. I will work hard and produce for you. I don’t need an incentive bonus to do my work.” And he did, for the next 30 years, until the day he retired.
      Everyone is entitled to their opinion. So, here’s mine. Money is a motivator, but not the only motivator, and not the best motivator either. We have all heard this scenario, “She quit ABC Auto Center, to get a job at XYZ Auto Repair, and she’s making less money now at XYZ!” We all know that people don’t leave companies, they leave the people they work for or work with.
      With all this said, I do believe that an incentive-based pay plan can work. However, I also believe that a technician must be paid a very good base wage that is commensurate with their ability, experience, and certifications. I also believe that in addition to money, there needs to be a great benefits package. But the icing on the cake in any pay plan is the culture, mission, and vision of the company, which takes strong leadership. And let’s not forget that motivation also comes from praise, recognition, respect, and when technicians know that their work matters.
      Rather than looking for that elusive perfect pay plan, sit down with your technician. Find out what motivates them. What their goals are. Why do they get out of bed in the morning? When you tie their goals with your goals, you will have one powerful pay plan.
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