Gonzo

I've got a story about everyone of those situations. It's not the answer, but it sure makes a person feel better about it all when they know they're not alone in this crazy mixed up world of auto repair. Read a few "Gonzo's Toolbox" stories. If nothing else, you'll feel a whole lot better after reading them.

Rehashing an old story... but a good one. This same thing happened again last week. The shop wasn't busy, but I was on the computer with a dead line to meet. I even told the guy the "shop" is closed today, but I'm taking appointments for next week. He should have ordered a happy meal.... a real jerk.

I often wonder if some people think car repair is like a fast food drive up restaurant. They must be thinking it is, because it’s the only way to explain their actions and questions at the front desk. I’ve even had people pull in front of the shop or right in front of a bay door (blocking any progress I was making) and expect me to do whatever it is right then and there. Where in the history of auto repair did this ever get started? Some of these “hurry-up-get-done-now” people just don’t get it. They seriously think there is a magical scanner that will not only diagnose, but also repair their car in 15 minutes or less. Now, I pride myself on diagnosing most problems within a given time period, usually 10 minutes or less, to no more than 45 minutes for some stubborn type problems. If it takes longer than 45 minutes just to diagnose it, I’m either doing it wrong, skipped a procedure, or I’ve finally met my match, and it’s time to go flip hamburgers for a living. But if we are talking about the actual repair … that can take a lot of time. But as far as what it means to a service tech when somebody wants to wait while hovering over them like a vulture… well, it usually means (to me), they don’t trust the technician. Maybe they just want to learn something… Really?… Learn what? How to fix their car so they don’t have to bring it into the repair shop next time...? I guess that would speed things up a bit. But I’m not there to teach, I’m there to fix the car. I’d like to tell them they should go stand over the cooks and watch how they’re making their next burger … yea; I can see that going over real well at the restaurant. There is also another type of person out there that not only has a great deal of miss-trust for service people, but their personal lives are so hectic they can’t slow down to watch a sunset. They expect everything in their life to snap to attention when they say go, and nobody better slow them down. They’ll wait in the lobby or waiting room for only so long, and then they’ll start to pace around like a thoroughbred race horse anxious to get out of the starting blocks. First in the waiting room, then into the front of the office, finally their pacing reaches out into the parking lot, and up and down in front of the service bay doors… usually with their cell phone stuck to their head, trying to find another repair shop in the area that can “get-to-it” quicker than I can. By the time the pacing has reached the service bay level, the waiting is usually over, and they’ll come up with some excuse like, “I just need to check on a few things across town. I’ll be back in an hour or so” or “I forgot something at home, I’ll be right back. Save me a spot OK?” Sure … you forgot something … Oh don’t worry, I’ve saved a special spot just for you. Now really, do ya think I just fell of the proverbial turnip truck just yesterday? I guess you think you’ve come up with this grandiose idea of how to graciously back out of waiting all by yourself, and nobody has ever tried that line on me before. Right, you keep thinking that… … and of course, they never make it back… they’re gone… gone for good. My wife will always tell me, “One car at a time, honey.” I know, I know… it still bugs me that people can’t be patient. I guess I’ll never understand. Maybe what I should do is buy an old fast food restaurant with a drive up window, and set up a menu board with a selection of different types of auto repairs on it with prices clearly marked. Forget diagnosing cars, forget verifying complaints, and just fix whatever they order through that scratchy sounding intercom. I’d do all the money transactions at the first window, and then motion them onto the next window where a team of techs would jump out with little paper hats on and go at it with the speed of a pit crew. Wrenches flying, impacts at the ready, timing belts flying through the air and landing in the engine with every tooth precisely in place, and… before you know it… the car is back on the road. Wow, what an idea… Rush, rush, rush, rush… hurry, hurry, hurry… that’s what it’s really all about. I’m rushed enough anymore, I don’t need any help from a cell phone carrying customer pacing in front of my service bays. It should be pretty simple to understand if all the bays are full and people are busy it’s more than likely you’re going to have to wait. You know, we all can’t be first in line… quit shoving; you’ll get your turn. What’s really funny, well sort of funny… is the car in question isn’t even in the service bay yet. We haven’t even begun to see the fun we’ll be having with Mr. or Mrs. Hurryup especially when you finally get it diagnosed and you tell them it’s going to take a few hours to fix their car. I’d like to think I can help anyone who comes to my door, but you know, I’ve been at this a long time. I know better. Trying to please everyone is never going to be possible. I’m better off standing at the front desk and taking down their information and when they tell me… “I need this done right now!” I’m going to answer them with; “You want fries with that?” and see what kind of response I get then. View full article

don't worry... you will. stay at it long enough it'll happen, you can bet on it. LOL

this new layout is cool. wish I could do this on my website.

Down and Out in the Service Bay A big portion of a mechanic’s job is to deal with troubles. From trouble shooting, trouble codes, trouble with tools, diagnostic troubles, and then some parts that can be nothing but trouble. Trouble seems to go with the job description, but what’s most troubling is a customer’s car that decides to end it all in the service bay without any prior warning or inclination that something dreadful is about to happen. Take this next story: A car comes in for a routine brake job. Nothing special, just the typical front pad replacement and rotor resurfacing. The job is going well, no trouble to speak of until the mechanic attempts to restart the car and check the brakes. Just as it starts a low grinding noise is heard from the engine, and within a split second the noise goes from a soft metal grind to an all-out attack on your ear drums. The engine starts to lope in cadence with the metal-slapping-metal sound. The noise is deafening; mechanics in the other service bays have stopped what they’re doing to find out where the noise is coming from. To the mechanic’s ear, this rattling, bone jarring clanking sound can only mean one thing… a connection rod has just snapped. As quickly as possible the key is shoved into the off position. The mechanic races to look under the hood, only to find oil has sprayed all over the engine bay. That clanking rod, well… it blasted a hole the size of the Grand Canyon into the side of the block. Oil is still oozing out of the now dysfunctional engine as the service manager and a whole squad of front office people make their way to the scene. The question on everyone’s mind is, “Who’s going to tell the customer?” and “How did this happen?” The car had no signs of a pending failure as it was checked in at the service desk, the porter who drives them into the service bay didn’t have anything to add, and the mechanic who did the brake job was dumbfounded that such thing could ever have happened in the first place. Well, it did happen, and yes, it’s not the first time and certainly not the last. Whether it’s a truck frame that was so rusted out that once it was put on a lift it literally split in two, or that old customer who came by to have the trunk light bulb replaced and left his car running just outside the service bay. As you’re fiddling with the bulb, the fan belt shredded and lodged itself behind the water pump pulley so tight that you had to replace the water pump. There seems to be no end to the way some cars want to commit suicide while they’re near the service bay. I’ve had similar issues over the years myself. Timing belts that spit teeth off on a test drives, CV shafts that snap as the mechanic turned the corner to align it up with the shop door, to countless electrical components that suddenly and mysteriously failed at the moment I got near them. One time I had an regular customer who stopped by just to visit. Not for any service work, just to say Hi and see what I was up to. When he went to leave, the front pump in the transmission decided this was the right time to call it quits. Right there in front of the shop! Which of course led to me dropping what I was doing and perform an impromptu and hasty on the spot unscheduled diagnosis. Neither one of us had any clue as to why this car decided this was the appropriate time and place to end it all. At least it was already lined up for the service bay! Talk about being down and out in the service bay. Like there’s not enough trouble to deal with, then things like this happen. Some of it is so strange that you’d swear somebody made it all up, but it’s all true. Some have an explanation, others are a complete mystery, but it does happen. Most of the time there is a bit of information that’s been left out of the scenario. Usually the guilty party won’t confess right off the bat, but sooner or later the truth does come out. Although, the car can’t talk, the remaining shrapnel and other broken parts will leave plenty of clues as to what was the origin of this latest suicidal attempt. I’d like to say, “I’ve seen it all.” But who am I kidding? There’s always something else that will surprise me in the future, and I’m sure every mechanic has their own down and out story they’d like to tell. Misery loves company… so what’s your down and out story? View full article

I left out the ones who come in from other repair shops telling me there primary secondary is first thing that has failed ... but the other shop knew what was wrong but they didn't know how to fix it Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk

So, What’s Wrong With Your Car? It’s the typical question asked at the service desk of automotive repair shops across the country. You’d think the answer would be simple, you know, just tell the service writer what ails the car, but no… that’s not the typical answer from the do it yourselfer. When asked, some people have a hard time keeping things simple. Their answer isn’t really an answer, it’s more of a statement of the things they’ve done to their car. Now why is that? How come when the service writer asks, “So, what’s wrong with the car?” the answer is, “I changed the battery, the alternator, and I rewired everything under the hood.” Which sounds more like what they did to the car, rather than what is wrong with the car. It troubles me to hear things like this over and over. All I want to know (as the mechanic about to service the issue) is what is wrong, not what you’ve done. Believe me, any mechanic worth his salt will figure out what you’ve done to the car. What he lacks is the reason you’re here in the first place. I’ve even tried to rephrase the question, “So, what brings you here today?” That doesn’t seem to work any better. It’s like some unwritten law of responses; the DIY’r type customer has to begin their dissertation with what they’ve done and not the actual problem that brought them to the repair shop in the first place. Now, if the service writer starts the deliberation with, “In as few words as possible, tell me what is wrong.” It doesn’t seem to help at all, and if the question asked is, “So, what did ya do to it?” that only puts them in a defensive mode which doesn’t improve the answer or any further forthcoming information. Ya just gotta stand there and listen intently and with unbiased interest in their tale of tales. I often wonder if the whole thing is a pride issue with some of these guys. Maybe what they are really telling the service writer is more in line with how they tried to fix it but failed, rather than actually trying to explain the problem they can’t solve. Somehow the mere explanation of all the individual parts that were changed is supposed to inform the mechanic of things they shouldn’t assume are the problem. There are those who finish their story with, “and, everything checks out good.” How’s that ever happen? If everything is “good” you wouldn’t be having a problem. From the mechanics point of view, “everything” has to be rechecked under the guise of the proper identification of any components replaced, the quality of those components that were replaced, as well as checking the wiring. Once all that is confirmed then the mechanic can check the signals and voltages. It’s one of the many things that separate the DIY’r from the professional. A pro will diagnose things rather than simply change parts. A systematic list of diagnostic procedures isn’t that hard to follow, but understanding the results can be. Apparently that’s where I find it hard to follow some of these DIY’r logics. They’ll come up with some goofy name for a part or symptom based on their background or something they’ve overheard. None of which have anything to do about automotive repair or cars in general. But, you’ve gotta listen to their story, no matter what they say. I’ve found over years of being behind the service counter, you should never ever interrupt or correct their explanation. Just let them get it all out, and then hopefully work back to “So what’s wrong”. I’ve been tempted more than once to stop them in the middle of their story, hold my hand up and say, “I didn’t ask you what you did. I asked you what’s wrong.” I’m not sure that would go over that well. While they are well on their way of their next novel and spilling their tool box of parts they’ve changed in verbal form, I’m trying to keep up with it all by writing as much of it down. Usually, I’m crossing off things as their explanation goes further into the story about how they don’t want you to check that part (because it’s new) or that particular part they just mentioned was changed years ago and hasn’t been a problem since, but for some reason (which they’re not sure of), it suddenly has become extremely important to inform me about it. By the end of the story I’ve gone through a blank invoice on both sides, a scratch pad, and ran out of ink in the pen. To top things off, a lot of these home garage repairmen insist on waiting, or in a lot of instances want to watch. This for the most part, can be just as frustrating for the mechanic as listening to their saga. Most shop insurance policies frown on having a customer in the shop area due to the numerous pieces of unusual and dangerous types of equipment, let alone getting in the way of the process of diagnosing the problem. If you want to watch, go find a You Tube video on the problem, the repair shop is not an educational outlet for the uniformed. Sometimes, the DIY’r is pretty sharp and might actually have a working knowledge of their car. It’s rare, but there are a few who really could tackle their problem without consecutively changing the alternator five times in a row. Let’s face it, car repair isn’t rocket science, but as the technology proceeds into even more data lines and computer systems it might as well be. Which to me, means an even wider gap between the DIY’r and the professional mechanic, and probably a whole lot more unbelievable stories at the service counter. Will the question at the service counter change? Will the answers from the DIY’r get to the point before the service writer has to break out a second scratch pad or a new pen? Probably not. There’s something about fixing your own car that brings out the mechanic in all of us. Whether it’s a pride issue or to save the cost of a professional mechanic, DIY’rs will still give it a try with little to no information. Just wing it and see what happens. Don’t worry, they’ll still sell parts, and they’ll still sell tools, as well as the good ol’ free code read at the part stores. Oh, and there are manuals at these parts stores too, but you don’t need those. They are for someone who doesn’t know about cars, not somebody like yourself? (I’m being sarcastic, of course) So there’s plenty of opportunity for a new “So what’s wrong with your car?” moment at the local repair shop. When stumped, they’ll find a pro to check their car out. And, I’m sure they’ll still tell the service writer their entire story about all the parts they’ve changed, all the books they’ve read, and how many You Tube videos they’ve watched, without ever getting to the “what’s wrong” until the very end. It’s just the way it is. But I already know what the service writer is thinking after they ask, “So, what’s wrong with the car?” and the answer turns into a long winded story. Yea, he’s got a pretty good idea what’s wrong with the car...you worked on it first. View full article

I don't know of one shop that has NOT experienced this exact scenario of the "un-assured" motorist. I'm hoping this gets in my column. We'll see........

The Unassured Motorist You’re driving down the road when all of a sudden the check engine light comes on. The car begins to sputter, cough, and nearly dies. You find yourself in need of a good mechanic, so you decide to make a few phone calls. But which one? Who can you trust? Motorist should be cautious when trying out a new mechanic, even recommended ones. The reasons for being cautious are as varied as the car problems themselves. It’s not like you can go to good ol’ dad for the repairs. Things are bit different than they were just a few decades ago. Back then the car manufacturers built the cars and good ol’ dad kept it running by tinkering on the family car in the drive way. Every conceivable part was available at the corner parts store, and since most everything was rather simple, dad could tackle just about any job. Very seldom did the car go to a regular repair shop, unless you had one of those dads who didn’t work on cars. By the time the computer age came along, good ol’ dad had met his match. Things were getting too complicated for the average guy to work on the family truckster. More and more parts were dealer only with a no return policy, so taking guesses at the repair could affect the family budget. (But we all know good ol’ dad never, ever guessed at a repair.) The computer age might have done more for the mechanic and consumer relationships than just changes in the automotive world. Now, it’s not good ol’ dad fixing the car, but some stranger at a repair shop, and some of the motoring public may not be too sure the guy with the big tool box knows what he’s doing. It’s that lack of assurance in the mechanic’s abilities which can hold back a lot of repairs at the shop. (Of course, we never questioned good ol’ dad’s qualifications). More to the point, qualifications are important, but the repair shop has an even bigger responsibility of reassuring the motoring public that they can do the job. Sooner or later, every repair shop and mechanic will encounter an unassured motorist. They’ll question the cost, perhaps ask how long the shop has been in business, or maybe (very rarely) ask to see their credentials. It’s important that there is a trust established between the shop and the unassured motorist. This ultimately comes down to how you (the service guy) answer their concerns and how comfortable the motorist feels with the answers. Otherwise, the shop loses out at the intersection of lost work and bad reviews, because the damage done from an unassured motorist may never be fully repaired. For some, the mere thought of paying someone too “look” at the car is enough to send them back out the door. Good ol’ dad never charged them for looking at the car, so why should this guy with the expensive scanner? It might be a carry-over from years gone by when mechanics were more grease than data signals. I’m not sure. Thankfully, the old stereotypical vision of a mechanic is slowly disappearing as the sophistication of the modern car increases. Sometimes just a single word can break down the newly found trust with the service center. Things like, “no warranty”, “obviously, you don’t understand”, or “your problem sounds expensive”. To the motorist who is unsure about a repair shop, certain phrases just might be the tipping point to leaving their car or leaving with their car. Keep in mind, they have questions, too. “Have you seen this type of problem before?” They’re not just asking if the shop is familiar with the problem, they’re asking if they’ve fixed this kind of problem before. (Hmm, never asked ol’ dad that question.) Of course, if they’ve already self-diagnosed their problem, and the mechanic is trying to interject with their own “over the counter” diagnostics, it may inadvertently cause even more confusion. Sometimes, the unassured motorist can be even less sure of the repair shop’s abilities after a repair or diagnosis. Especially if the diagnostic results are something they’re not familiar with or have never heard of before. For instance, the mechanic tells the motorist their alternator is bad, but they’ve never seen the warning light on the dash stay on. Even though the mechanic goes over the test results and describes the problem thoroughly, there’s still some doubt. Being too technical, or not technical enough is a fine line between understanding and disbelief. It’s still a question of trust. The best bet for the repair shop is to give the unassured motorist the most honest answer they can give and try to answer their question as best as possible. But, that’s not all. There are thousands of unrelated reasons why someone would favor one shop to another. It may come down to those political protest posters the boss left behind the counter, or the location of the shop, maybe your religious affiliation, or it could be something about the shop decor. So what are the best ways of helping the unassured motorist become assured? What makes it work at one shop may not work at all for the shop down the street. The best thing we can do is to treat everyone fairly and with respect on both sides of the service counter. Regardless of where they come from, or what their political and social beliefs are. Repair shops need customers, customers need repair shops, and they both need assurance from time to time. All it takes is a bit of understanding and confidence … and maybe a bit of reassurance once in a while. View full article

Yea, it's a hoot being the grumpy old guy. That's me for sure. But, like I conveyed in the article, the grumpy old guy just lets those youngsters think they're all that smart. LOL. And yes, I agree, the old guy still can pull out a rabbit out of the hat.

Just as important....Update the mechanic.

Mechanics 3.0 There’s a time and place that everything that is new becomes old. It’s so true in the computer world that changes takes place almost overnight it seems. One day it’s Windows 7 the next it’s Windows 10. In some respects these changes greatly improves how the average consumer’s interacts with each other and conducts their daily lives. Which for the most part, is what all those changes are supposed to be about. Those same principals affect the automotive world too. New procedures, new testing methods, different scanners capabilities, and tons of new technology seem to pop up overnight. Which also means one more thing to the automotive mechanic… time to update their personal skills. In most states there’s no regulation to keep someone from poking around under the hood of a car, or for that matter, hanging a shingle on a shop door and call themselves a “mechanic”. Tools and training aren’t requirements either. The unsuspecting consumer is at the mercy of the phone book (and other sources) to find a shop that can actually make the appropriate repairs they need. They never ask the shop whether or not they use the latest equipment or knows how to use what equipment they already have. No, of course not, price is the important part, not training or technology, and price seems to be their only incentive to go to certain shops. They’ll take cheap services over skilled mechanics every time and then when it doesn’t work out, they’ll blame the entire industry for their misfortunes. But, on the other hand, it takes more than money and a few high end scanners to make a shop function properly. It takes trained individuals that dedicate their time and efforts into performing the tasks at hand. If you’re lacking in one of those areas you’re probably going to have a tough time keeping up with the changes. Scanners you can buy, money you can borrow, but the trained technician, well… that’s another story. Unlike it was decades ago, and I’m talking a long long time ago, a good mechanic could learn nearly everything they needed to know by listening and observing other mechanics in their local area. In fact most of the tools they needed could be purchased off of the tool trucks or at the local department store. Even though the tool trucks offer nearly every conceivable tool these days, they don’t have access to the manufacturer type scanners and certain specialty tools. Which can be extremely important when it comes to certain programming issues and repairs. But, tools don’t make a mechanic. These days, the on the job training aspect has become more than a mechanic checking out what’s going on in the next service bay. It’s worldwide now, with different mechanic groups popping up everywhere. Everything from diesel mechanics to scope readers and anything else in between. There are groups with websites, on Facebook, Twitter, and hundreds of other places. Some are private, some are public, but they all have one thing in common, and that’s sharing the knowledge about today’s cars. Think of it this way, the knowledge needed for today’s cars is far more in-depth than one person could ever completely understand. It took a team of engineers to design and create these modern rolling computers and one mechanic can’t possibly know every aspect of every system in every car. To be today’s mechanic you really have to be more involved with the world around us and absorb as much of that information you can from these groups across the globe. Obviously, some things haven’t changed that much on cars. Such as tie rod ends, and lug nuts for example. Sure, there are different styles and different sizes but their functions are exactly the same as they were 50 years ago. But, that can’t be said about the engines electronics, transmissions, heating systems, charging systems and a whole lot of other systems that I could mention. Let’s not forget about all the systems the latest technologies have made available to the modern car. Such as lane assist, adaptive cruise control, tire monitor systems, and so much more. These are the changes the modern mechanic has to keep up with or they’ll soon fall behind. Technology has changed the car mechanic world forever. You might ask, how is a mechanic to know about all of these changes? Simple, get involved and be involved with a these technician’s groups and use their knowledge to advance your own. Now, for those younger techs out there. That doesn’t mean ignore the grumpy old guy in far back corner that the boss sends all the old cars to. There’s a lot more he has probably forgotten than you’ll ever find while tapping around on your phone. Just the same, when the old guy comes over and asks you to reset the oil reminder light it may not be that he doesn’t know, more likely he’s letting you youngster feel important. He may not be running Windows 10 but he’s definitely not obsolete. He’s fine running the older Mechanics 1.0 as his operating system. Besides, they’re usually pretty smart guys in their own rights and probably don’t want to know or care to learn all that computer mumbo-jumbo. Think of updating your mechanic skills the same way you would think of updating your old computer. No doubt a lot of shops have a few old scanners sitting on shelves that aren’t used anymore. Mainly, because they’ve been outdated by the newer systems and most likely the cars those scanners were designed for are long gone as well. However, changing to a new system on your laptop also means that you’ve got to learn how to use it too, that goes for the mechanic as well. Everything eventually gets updated, and if you want to keep current you’ve got to update your skills as well as your computer. There’s always something that’s changing, new software, new tools, and of course new skills to learn. It’s all part of the modern mechanics world with something new to learn each and every day. Keeping up is part of the process, besides, you don’t want to be the last guy in the shop still running on Mechanics 3.0. View full article

Building a Canoe Have you ever noticed when you’re relaxing at home, or at work trying to accomplish something, sooner or later somebody comes along and asks, “So, whatcha doin’?” It happens to me all the time. Around my house though, there’s a typical answer you’ll get if you ask such a question, and that’s, “I’m building a canoe.” Meaning, “It’s not all that important what I was doing. Thanks for caring, but I’d like to get back to what I was doing.” It’s a running joke at my house. Nobody takes it seriously. It seems at my house, no matter what the situation is, somebody is building a canoe somewhere. Now at the shop, well, I’m not sure anyone would understand “building a canoe”, and it definitely wouldn’t be appropriate. But, I’ve certainly had my fair share of chances to shout it out from time to time. Take the typical phone call that asks, “If you’re not real busy right now, I’ve only got a couple of questions I’d like to ask.” Not a problem, nothing is as important as helping the next person in line. Go ahead and ask, but if the questions seem to be from the far side of the lake I might start answering with nautical terms or what size oars I’m carving out. By then, you’ll know I’m probably not following your line of questions too closely. Let’s face it, I’m just a mechanic. According to some, I’m supposed to have more in common with a Neanderthal than a rocket scientist. Figuratively speaking of course. But, at the same time, I’m supposed to have the solution for any type of problem at a moment’s notice, and know exactly the cost of each and every part from each and every manufacturer cataloged in my brain, and if I can’t answer their question with the answer they expected I must either be a Neanderthal, or I’ve spent way too much time building canoes and not on my chosen profession. It goes back to the old school of thought that it doesn’t take a lot of brain cells to do this job. I’m not sure where that comes from, or how it ever got started. But, if you’ve watched a few old TV shows from the 50’s and 60’s it’s pretty clear that the portrayal of a mechanic is almost always one of a dopy guy with a greasy rag hanging out of his pocket who couldn’t hold an intelligent conversation with anything beyond a boat oar. That perception has gotta change, these days it takes a highly trained, technically savvy mechanic to diagnose and repair the modern car. Like many professional mechanics, I don’t spend my time under the hood of a car to answer questions. I’m there to do my job, and that’s fix the car. But, there are those occasions when one of those rubberneckers is leaning over the fender and you know at some point they’re going to ask, “Whatcha doing now?” I seriously want to break out into a long dissertation of how I’ve been building this canoe. It’s probably best I don’t paddle in that direction, as I’d have to explain the canoe thing. Being so involved in your work is one thing. Being asked questions while you’re working is another. Sometimes it’s not a problem, while other times it throws you so far off you’ve got to regroup your thoughts and start all over again. I’ve often wondered how a psychologist would interpret some of the things I hear at the shop. Maybe I really don’t want know, maybe I’m the crazy one and everyone else is just building their own canoes. A perfect example was a hot afternoon with several jobs going all at once. The shop was buzzing and everybody was super busy when this guy came to the service counter. “Ya got a second? OK, OK, like… I changed the starter, the battery, and the ignition switch. Then, I changed the window switch, all the relays, and the fuel pump. I was told it could be the power steering pump, so I changed that too, and while I was at it, me and a buddy replaced the heater core. So, so, how much do ya charge to look at my car?” For me, I prefer the logical approach to answering customer’s questions. That is to answer each and every one of their concerns correctly and professionally. But in this case, which end of the canoe are we talking about? I’m not quite sure what I was really asked. There I am just paddling along (working out in the shop), doing my thing, and when I pull up to the shore line (run up to the service counter) somebody starts telling me about what parts they changed on their car and not necessarily problems I’m capable of solving. Do I ask this guy, “I take it the car doesn’t start?” or do I answer the only question that I actually heard? Is there more than one canoe involved in this story, or have I been paddling on the wrong lake all this time? By now, I should have a whole fleet of canoes. But, I never ever seem to finish the first one, before I’m swept downstream on another adventure. There’s always another job, another phone call, and another, “Hey, do ya got a second to answer some questions?” Which usually leads to another canoe. Working on cars, and all this high tech razzle dazzle stuff can be a trying effort, but it’s what mechanics do every day. It’s one of those jobs that seems easy, but in reality, it’s not. It’s something that not everyone is cut out for. It has its rewards as well as its down sides. But for the most part it’s a great career choice and if you’re like me, finding and fixing the problems is what it’s all about. However, I wouldn’t mind building canoes as a career choice either. It’s another one of those jobs where working with your hands is the only way of getting things accomplished, and I’m definitely a hands on type of guy. We all could use a little more time to just float along and enjoy the gentle current and scenery. You know, take in the big picture for a change, and realize none of us really have it that bad after all. Maybe a little less of that rush-rush and hurry up-stay-on schedule in our lives. Mechanic or canoe builder, every trade has their issues. But, when the day is done, and we have that moment to sit back and forget about the shop or that next car we’ve got to work on, it’s the perfect time to day dream about a leisurely float down a lazy river. So, as you’re sitting there in your easy chair, smiling, taking in that imaginary scenery and somebody comes along and asks, “Whatcha doin’?” just tell them… “I’m building a canoe.” It’ll be our little secret. View full article

You Know you’re a Mechanic if: I’ll bet you’ve been turning wrenches and talking with customers for quite some time now. You’ve probably tossed around the idea of changing careers at one time or another, too. The grease, grime, technical and mechanical stuff, as well as the various ups and downs of the day to day drudgery all fits you like a glove, but you’re still not sure if you truly are a professional mechanic. Worry no more. Here’s a list of the probable reasons to convince you that you really are what you are, a real life professional mechanic. You have no trouble spending more money on the tool trucks than you do on your girlfriend or wife. You know every type of automotive fluid by taste, but not by choice. Losing a socket is more frustrating than losing your keys. You have to wash your hands before nature calls. You’re a bit smarter than a fifth grader, especially if a fifth grader had to answer questions about the technical and mechanical aspects of the modern automobile. But, naming the capitals of all 50 states isn’t one of your strong points. Being told by the service writer that the customer isn’t paying for that hour you just spent figuring out the problem, and they’re not going to have the work done after all, because, “A” – The customer said that you should have known what was wrong before you even started testing it, “B” – The customer is acting like a fifth grader. Spending an hour and half busting off a rusted bolt for a job that only pays .5. Listening to every walk of life explain to you the same type of problem on the same type of car, but in totally different ways, and still being able to sort through all these explanations and arrive at the correct solution to the same problem every time. Spend $100,000.00 on personal tools and education to make less than that a year. You’re a self-taught contortionist who can maneuver into places that seem humanly impossible. You’ve been told that you don’t need an education to do this job, anybody can do it. It’s not unusual on a busy day to have a lunch on the fly only to realize your sandwich has as many grease prints on it as your shop rag. You can remember 12 digit part numbers, the oil filter size for an 85 Camaro, and the firing order on every V8 engine, but can’t remember your wife’s birthday. You read car forums on the internet just to get a good laugh at the suggestions. If you’ve ever been annoyed with the parts guy when he asks, “Is that a two or 4WD?” when all you wanted was wiper blades. You know, from experience, that torqueing a greasy bolt with an open end wrench also means you should check the path of the wrench for any obstacles that may end up embedded in your hand. When somebody says, “Sinchya got it in shop…” you break out in hives and your upper lip curls into an Elvis snarl. The wife notices you still have grease on your elbows when you’re out to dinner after work. Then, she chides you for having them on the table. You’ve ever had to order a part and the wiring diagram calls it by one name, the locator page calls it something else, the parts department calls it by another name, and still yet, the labor guide has a completely different name for the exact same part. “Lefty-loosey-righty-tighty” does not apply to the side of a car with reverse lug nuts, and you know which vehicles those are. You can’t have a meaningful conversation with anyone who simply calls themselves a mechanic and wants to talk about fixing cars, except for another true mechanic. Thankfully, your wife understands you even though she doesn’t have a clue what you’re talking about. You don’t think of repairs based on what it they cost, but on how much aggravation is in involved. You can spot a professional mechanic from a “wanna-be” mechanic as soon as they tell you how they diagnosed the car they’re still having problems with. You have a rather low opinion of anyone who calls themselves a mechanic if their entire education is based on watching You Tube videos from other non-professional type mechanics. Not all the screwdrivers you own will fit into one drawer. For you, an open hood is like a moth to a flame. You know what cheap sockets are good for. You know what a cheap socket looks like. Borrowing tools is a sin; not returning borrowed tools is a crime. You’ve pondered, which came first: the wrench or the screwdriver. So, quit your grumbling, stop your fussing, and no more belly aching that you’re going to change professions or something. Just grab your tools and get back to work. Cause you are what you are, nothing more and nothing less. You’re a professional mechanic, something a lot of people don’t have the knack or natural talent to ever achieve in their lifetime. The skills of a professional technician aren’t in a tool box, or in some video, they’re in the hands of the person holding the wrench. Hold your head high and say it proudly when someone asks what you do. Tell em’… I know what I am, I’m a mechanic. View full article

Most of these "hack" shows take a busted down, rusted out, pile of unwanted metal and turn it into some sort of wanna-be show room super car. They're not customer cars, they don't have to deal with a customer who's wanting their car back and doesn't like the price of the repair or diagnostics. To me, these guys are no different than a weekend wrench head building his personal dream car. All their quality control is basically each other. Engineers spend hours upon hours working out the issues with all the modern electronics and do their best to make it all work. Which, for the most part, a lot of these shows steer the viewer away from anything that remotely looks "electrically complicated". I'm not sure any one of these guys on these shows could diagnose and repair an air bag system or have much of a clue about today's CAN systems. You want a "real" show about the mechanic world...show me a show, showing real customers cars being fixed with real scanners and tools under real conditions at a "real" repair shop with real mechanics. Personally, I've watched most of these shows at least once. Not impressed, and I haven't watched any of them a second time. I think they're degrading, unprofessional, and down right a lie to the trade. I'd guarantee to you that if ya got the chance to look under the dash of some of these creations it would make the professional mechanic sick. just sayin. TV is TV, reality is NOT TV.