Going Out Of For Business

The vocation of an automotive repair person is one of those trades where you might find you have the knack for it at a young age, or you might be one of those people who have the ambition and drive to learn this trade by attending a trade school or on the job. Even though you might know a lot about what you’re doing today, there’s a good chance you haven’t seen it all, and more than likely you will encounter something new and different tomorrow. This is definitely not one of those trades where you learn a couple of procedures and they remain the same for a lifetime. It’s an always changing and always improving career. To stay current with the latest innovations and techniques, today’s mechanic spends a lot of time reading, studying, and learning those latest improvements. Without it, there’s not much chance of making it as a professional mechanic.

From time to time, I hear about shops closing up, or mechanics selling their tools and thinking about going into a different line of work. With a national shortage of qualified technicians out there, how is this possible that shops and mechanics are calling it quits? Are they getting tired of the constant negativity from misinformed customers? Could it be that today’s cars don’t break down as often? Perhaps they broke their only ½ inch socket and can’t find a replacement. Maybe it’s just time for certain individuals to move on, or it might be retirement that’s on the agenda. Maybe it’s health or family issues, divorces, or partnership breakups. All of which are a possibility, but I think there is one more thing that is an even bigger part of the problem…. Training.

Recently a shop not too far away shut their doors for good. This particular shop had been around for a long, long time. But, their quality of service had dwindled to a very noticeable and unsatisfactory level over the past few years. They were still doing A/C work without a recovery machine (no section 609 either), and no scanners or code readers. How they got by with that for as long as they did is beyond me. Neither the owner, nor the guys he hired wanted to learn anything new. They wanted to keep on doing what they’ve been doing for the last couple of decades, and only work on cars from those eras… and nothing more.

Obviously, those types of cars are few and far between these days, but there still out there, and yes, a few shops and technicians have managed to make it a viable market for them, but seriously... there’s not enough of that type of work out there to sustain more than a few shops in a given area. So, what should a mechanic or shop do? I’d say it’s time to step up to the world of electronics, internet, and the sophisticated automobile. Today’s cars are not what they used to be, and the technical knowhow of the modern mechanic has far exceeded anything that I could have even dreamt of even 10 years ago. Yes, that right, the stereotypical mechanic of the past has left the building a long, long time ago. Today it’s a whole lot different. Now it’s college educated, or trade school graduate, or a lot of off hours training, and it requires a highly skilled craftsman to make the repairs. But, along with good training, good equipment, and a good attitude today’s shops and mechanics alike spend plenty time getting the word out to those potential customers. Uses what else? The internet, from social media pages to videos, to instructional lessons and chat groups they’re getting the word out… they’re going out for business.

Mind you, there are still a lot of throwback customers and mechanics out there who believe the world of automotive repair should consist of a dingy, dimly lit small shop with grease covered floors, and a mechanic who still carries his grease rag in his back pocket. (No offense to those who still do.) Some of these customers and mechanics haven’t figured out that computers have taken over everything yet. They’re about 40 years off of today’s pace. Today’s modern shop is clean, well kept, and anything but those early dirt floor shops. That’s not to say you won’t find a small older shop with a few rough edges here and there that has all the same modern technical information, and a mechanic that knows how to use it all just like the large volume repair shop does. There are still plenty of those types of shops out there as well.

For the most part, gone are the “swap-til’-ya-got-it” repair days. For example, back in the 70‘s and early 80‘s electronic ignition systems only consisted of a few components, and it was common practice for a mechanic to have a few known good ignition modules lying around that were used as test pieces. (I’ll bet, if I dug around a bit I might even still have some of those old modules still hiding in a drawer somewhere.) These days a good scanner not only reads codes, but allows for bi-directional control of a lot of systems, as well as letting the mechanic see just about every facet of the car by simply plugging it into a laptop. From power windows to the transmission, with the right tools and training you don’t even have to turn a wrench (most of the time) to do any analysis on a given system.

Instead of going out of business maybe what some of them need to think about is “Going Out for Business”. Simply put, it’s using today’s internet, Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, etc... to their advantage. There are so many sources for information and videos there is no excuse for not being able to repair today’s vehicles. Along with that, websites for the shop and even an individual mechanic are useful to gain knowledge and a reputation for quality work by showcasing what he/she does. It’s all about communication and getting the word out to the masses that you’ve got what it takes to repair today’s cars. Sure, word of mouth is still a tried and true method of exposure, but the tech savvy mechanic and/or shop will find an even better response from using the today’s technology to draw in new customers. As a shop owner myself, keeping the bays full is a premium, and taking advantage of the internet is a must.

You’ve probably heard the old saying, “Doing the same thing, but expecting different results is the definition of crazy”. As mechanics, shop owners, and even as a customer we all can fall into that trap of doing the same thing. So instead of making yourself crazy by doing the same old thing...or giving up and going out of business… try going out for business instead.

Go the Distance

It’s no wonder the average consumer fears going to the repair shop for anything. With the way some people diagnose problems on cars I don’t blame them. I run across more botched attempts than I care to remember. Hey, I’m not perfect by any means, and I certainly didn’t know what I know today back when I started. We all learn from our mistakes, but letting a mistake walk out the door of the shop isn’t smart. It’s one thing for a shop to tell a customer that a part has failed, but it’s an entirely different thing to replace the part, then throw their hands up and say, “You’ll have to take it to somebody else, because I don’t know what’s wrong with it.” Even though prior to installing the part they probably told the customer that it would fix their problem. And of course, somehow, some way the customer will have to cough up the cash to get their car out of that particular shop.

Is making the fast buck with the quick diagnosis their preferred method of operation? It must be. How about thoroughly testing the problem beforehand? Instead, when their guestimation doesn’t work they bail out of the repair. No wonder the automotive repair business has such a bad reputation. But, I can’t blame just the shops that do shoddy work for all of this; ya have to blame the customer as well.

Just because there’s a sign that says, “Mechanic on Duty”, or the marquee says “Thrifty Repair and Lube”, doesn’t tell me a whole lot about who’s going to be tinkering around with the second-most expensive thing in most peoples’ lives. Besides, Mr. and Mrs. Consumer, cheap oil changes are not the same thing as engine diagnostics, and there is a difference in skills of mechanics too. Oh, wait a second, I forgot about that one factor that dictates the answer to most everything, cost. Bargains are bargains, but risking your car for a bargain priced repair may be dangerous or even more costly in the long run.

The penny-pinching customer’s thought process, (as I’ve heard from different sources), goes something like this: “If I use the cheap shop and they get it wrong, I’m not out a whole lot. If I go to a reputable shop and they get it wrong, I would have to spend a whole lot more, and still be looking for someone else to fix the problem.”

In all fairness to reputable shops, the qualifications and skills of those individuals aren’t based on guess work or throwing a dart at a wall. Even if a shop looked at the problem and determined it wasn’t something they felt comfortable with, they would know the most reputable shops that could handle it. Believe me, all the shops in a given area know exactly the quality, or types of work, the other shops do in their area. They also know which shops to stay away from.

Training has a lot to do with what separates the mechanics who actually fix cars, and the ones who just throw their hands up? This training is an ongoing-never-ending process for the modern mechanic. The other part, and probably the most important part, is that they’ll stick it out, and find the problem; they’ll go the distance. When a technician is diagnosing a strange or rare problem, and gives up in the middle of it, he/she isn’t helping the customer, or the shop. A good diagnostic technician will go the extra mile and find out what’s wrong, rather than assume he can’t figure it out.

A perfect example of this is a car that came in from another shop just the other day. The story goes the car wouldn’t start, as the battery was dead. After installing a battery it started, but the mechanic found the wiper motor running constantly. So, he ordered a replacement motor. He installed it, but instead of the wipers working, it blew the wiper fuse. In the meantime, the supposedly new battery ran down to the point where the car wouldn’t start. He then recharged the battery and the car started, but still no wipers. Several trips to the printer to pull off copies of every wiring schematic he could find still added up to a complete zero for him. Now the car wouldn’t start again, and the wipers still weren’t working. He threw his hands up and said, “Ship it to another shop, it’s beyond me.”

Now I’m involved in this whole thing. The other mechanic even left all the schematics in the car for me. Well, the starting problem was no big deal. A little investigative work answered that little mystery. The battery was no good as I later found out; it was the shop test battery. Somebody put it back on the sales shelf by mistake. The wipers on the other hand… now that was a little different. If the other mechanic would have read the wiring diagrams, he would have found the problem. It was the wrong wiper motor for the car.

Even though he ordered the motor correctly, the motor was actually boxed wrong. This guy didn’t bother to check any further. Just because you installed a part and it still doesn’t work, doesn’t always mean the problem is elsewhere. It just goes to show that a diligent effort is needed in order to come to the right conclusion on any repair.

That’s the point. “Go the Distance” isn’t just a saying, it’s something that all mechanics/technicians should take into account when they are looking under a hood. Stopping short of a completed repair doesn’t make for a great relationship with your customer, nor your boss. Don’t expect the next guy to pick up the pieces, or for that matter if the parts guy got it right. You’re the guy on the firing line, no one else. If this is your career choice then make it a career, not a job. That means learn your trade, don’t parts change, and don’t rely on somebody else for the answers. Just because you can unbolt a part, and stick another one on, doesn’t make you much of a mechanic. Diagnosing, reading the repair information, and studying the wire schematics are all part of taking care of the customer’s needs. Sure you’ll make mistakes, but everyone does. The more time you spend today studying and learning the diagnostic information in front of you, the more likely tomorrow you won’t have to. If you want to be one of tomorrow’s top techs in demand, then start today and … Go the distance.

Advantages of Being an Older Mechanic

Age, the longer you’re around the older you’ll get. Doesn’t seem fair sometimes. As they say, “Youth is wasted on the young." The older cars get, the more things seem to go wrong with them, and the same goes for the aging mechanic. It’s the eyes that don’t focus as well when you’re staring at a wiring diagram, or the old back has a few twinges after lifting the crankshaft into place; then it’s the arthritis that works its devious little magic when you’re in a tight spot flipping an open end wrench over and over, on and on go the aliments.

Now, some customers prefer to deal with the older mechanic at the service desk. Maybe it’s because they represent a fatherly figure to them, or maybe they feel the older guy might have a lot more experience with their sort of problem. Whatever the reason, as an old guy in the shop myself, it’s kind of nice to chat about a car problem with a customer rather than trying to get up off of a creeper with bad knees.

When computers first came out they were a little intimidating to the older guy, but it didn’t take long before he got the hang of it. That is until one of those young socket rockets comes along, reaches over the old tech’s shoulder, flips a few keys and finds the information for him a whole lot faster than the way he was doing it. (I still don’t know all those short cut keys.) But it’s still fun to watch the “X” generation try to figure out a stalling or rough running problem without a laptop.

They’d freak out if they saw how we use to find air conditioning leaks with a bottle of propane and an open flame, or using a growler to check a generator. Yea, things were different back then. Nothing like the electronic world we live in today. In those days, mechanics used the procedures that were available, even if they seemed a bit crude. We didn’t have all these fancy, schmassy sensors to deal with. A piece of heater hose held to ones ear was all you needed to find a loose rocker.

One thing is for sure, an older tech has been around the block a few times. Just the other day a 79 Bronco came in and the owner wanted to get the A/C working again. Just a bad expansion valve was all. This thing was jacked a mile high with huge knobby tires. The younger guys didn’t want any part of it (no computer), so … I got handed the keys. Now for a guy my age to climb up there, it did take a bit of an effort. I ain’t no spring chicken, you know. First off I had to stand on an upside down milk crate just to get one foot on the bumper. Then climb up and do the old superman spread over the fender so I could reach all the way back to the firewall where the expansion valve was, and then… not to make it even more difficult, I had to get my head in just the right position so I could look through my bifocals. I’ve got the wrenches, the flashlight, and a couple of shop rags… and me “planking" this old truck trying to get this #$@% expansion valve off. So where’s the advantage in all of this? I don’t know…but there must be one somewhere.

Getting down was no picnic either. Those bifocals work two ways you know. If you’re looking down through your glasses that concrete floor looks a bit fuzzy and appears to be a lot closer than it really is. Of course as ya slide back down from this behemoth your belt has to get snagged on something and now you’re flopping around like a fish out of water trying to get unstuck. At least I made it back to terra-firma without having to call over one of the younger guys to guide me back onto the milk crate.

Really, there are advantages of being older; it’s just that some things aren’t so noticeable. Like, veteran mechanics probably have all the tools and then some. And, if a car comes in with a floor dimmer switch they know what it is for. In fact most of them will know what the second floor switch was for too. Yea, I know what you’re thinking; most of that stuff is museum pieces these days. Oh don’t worry, all you young wrenches out there, your turn to call today’s cars museum pieces is just a few decades away.

These days it takes some training in trade schools to learn this job, and you certainly will learn even more once you’re on the job. But, by far, you learn even more after several years of turning wrenches. From dealing with the technical changes and procedures, customers, the guy in the next bay, your boss, and of course the aches and pains of it all.

It’s the old horse shoe story that comes to mind. As one old timer explained it to me, when the farrier is shoeing a horse and he shows you the freshly heated horse shoe he has just fitted, don’t be a fool and pick it up. Like the old timer said to me, “I know better now, it don’t take me long to look at a horse shoe in a different light anymore!”

That’s experience talking. Experience is something that only comes with time. I can’t tell you when you’ll have it, but believe me, you’ll know when you’ve got it. Then again, if you’re the type of person who has to pick up that horse shoe a second time… well, you’re either a bit brain dead, or you need a touch more experience.

Most mechanics who have been around for 30 or 40 years (or more) have seen the changes from 6 volts to 12, generators to alternators, points and condensers, electronic ignition, and then onto today’s systems of sensors controlling it all. And, yes, the older mechanic has probably worked on every bit of them. Not to say that’s an advantage, but it sure is a lot of experience to say the least. But, as time passes along the old body isn’t what it used to be, and while those younger guys can thrash apart cars a whole lot faster, there’s still one advantage the older mechanic has: retirement isn’t that far away. No more learning all this new stuff, no more trying figure out the latest software, and no more of all this back breaking work.

History has proven that change is inevitable, and the old mechanic can now pat the younger techs on the back and tell them, “Have at it fellas. You young guns can take over from here.” Us old wrenches can take advantage of all the senior citizen discounts now, and a few spare parts from the doctor too! Let’s see, a couple of new knees, maybe a hip, oh and some laser surgery for the old eyes. Getting older does have a few advantages after all.

Mechanic by Definition

Over the years I’ve spent under a hood, I’ve heard the term mechanic thrown around in every possible direction. It seems everyone who has ever opened the hood of a car at one time or another has been referred to as a mechanic. On other occasions I hear, “I used to be a mechanic” or “My brother is a mechanic”. It’s a term seldom used correctly when speaking to the service writer. I compare it to using a brand name of a product vs. the product name such as “Freon” or “Kleenex”. We all get the idea of what they are referring to, but seldom does it equate to a reasonable facsimile of a true mechanic’s diagnostics when they are trying to explain something about their car. Maybe it’s time we established some ground rules as to how or whom can call themselves a mechanic.

Is it fair to call someone who has a basin sink wrench and a PVC cutter a plumber? No, I don’t think so. Is it fair to call a home owner who is changing out a receptacle an electrician? No, I don’t think that’s fair to say either. But, give somebody a service book, a box of tools and spot in the home garage … yep, they’re a mechanic. Of course, I’ll bet as soon as you have to call “the” plumber or electrician to take care of your “oops” the spouse will point out to the pro that you’re not one of them. I suppose the same thing happens with a box of wrenches when the car acts up too, I just don’t hear it as much as I think I ought too.

A perfect example of this is the guy who came in needing a fuel pump for his car. My price was way too high, why I was robbing the poor guy even before he could reach for his wallet. (His words not mine.) So, he decided to tackle the job himself. Two days later the same car was in the shop to have me change the pump. He never mentioned that he tried to do it himself; his only response was that he had thought it over, and decided it would be better if a professional took care of it. I could tell he tried to handle the job before he brought it in. Several bolts were loosened that didn’t need to be removed, and several brackets showed signs of someone trying to bend them out of the way. I think he wanted to keep the fact that he couldn’t figure out how to take the tank down as his own little personal secret. However, his spouse told me all about it when she picked up the car. Yes, as usual, the better half spilled the beans. As she put it, “He thinks he’s a mechanic.”

So what really defines someone as a mechanic? Is it fair to call the guy at the local tire shop whose job it is to remove 5 lug nuts, change the tire and balance the new one a mechanic? Should the person who changes out only exhaust pipes be labeled a mechanic? How about the guy who changes your oil? Is he a mechanic too? Yes… they all are. They’re just different forms of the same trade.

OK, so we’ve establish a baseline for the term “mechanic”, basically anyone who in some way uses tools to perform a service on a piece of machinery is a mechanic. Great, so from the baseline established we can make the assumption there are different levels of the trade as well. Each level requires a different expertise. Each level is just as important as the next. So in essence, there’s a lot of mechanics out there. However, for some reason a lot of consumers assume that all mechanics are the same. Because, well…you know… we’re mechanics.

This stereotypical analogy of a mechanic is one that I would love to see changed. Yes, there are mechanics out there that should probably stick to the wash bay or the lube rack, and never try to diagnose a no start condition. And, yes there are a lot of mechanics (and shops) that figure the best method of diagnosing a problem is to keep throwing more parts at it until they hit the one that makes it work. (And… yes… they call themselves mechanics too.) I’m sure every trade out there has the same types of individuals in their respective fields. It’s not just the automotive field. The big issue is the conception of the modern day consumer.

Some people take the term mechanic just a little too far, especially when they are at the service desk, and are trying to give me far too much information based on what another mechanic has told them about their car. Mainly, because their regular mechanic couldn’t do the repair that he/she thought was necessary. (Nine chances out of ten… they’re way off the mark as to what is wrong with the car.)

Just the other day, the owner of a small used car lot that I’ve done business with before asked if I could reflash a computer on a 1988 Chevy. I was quite startled at his request. I told him there is no reflash program on that old of a car. It does have a read only memory chip that is part of the computer system though. It’s called a PROM (Programmable read only memory) but, if it was a stock chip in the car there’s no changing it. (There are aftermarket programmable chips though… but he wasn’t referring to one of those.)

I guess he was basing it on previous cars that I’ve flashed for him, but those were a lot newer vehicles. I had to ask, “What’s the reason for all this fuss?” Turns out it was because his mechanic told him that a reflash would fix the stalling problem. “Stalling problem?” I questioned him, “I’d like to check it out first, before assuming it’s the ECM that’s the problem. There are a lot of other reasons for stalling other than the ECM.” I had a feeling his mechanic was a little out of his comfort zone on this one. (Not that it matters but, his mechanic was born in 1988.)

It’s too bad that we don’t have different degrees for mechanics, so we could recognize at what level they were proficient. Here’s something else to think about, a person who holds a certification in a given section of automotive repair doesn’t entirely mean they are adept at physically tackling that said job. Like most certifications, the concept behind it isn’t so much that you can do it, but merely that you understand how to.

We’ve got a long way to go to figure out what to call a mechanic when he/she is really a mechanic or not. It’s very clear to me, there are a lot of things to think about in defining a mechanic, and there’s even more in defining a good one.

Semper Fi

        Bob was well into his late 80's when I met him. He's quite the talker, and he'll never run out of things to tell you. I like old Bob. We have a few things in common, not much because of the years between us, but just enough that we can relate on quite a few subjects. We both served in the USMC. Of course, the years we served were decades apart, but even with the differences in time served, we still could "talk-the-talk" like two old veterans who just got their discharge papers.

       Bob had a problem with the horn buttons on his '92 Buick. It was the kind of horn that has its buttons and the air bag all built as one piece. He didn't have the money to replace the entire airbag, but he did want to get that horn working somehow. I thought I could get it to work even if I had to "rig" something up, but that was OK with him.

       With his advancing years catching up with him, his hands weren't the best. Most of his strength had faded with time, and so did the ability to straighten his fingers all the way out. I had to come up with a way that he could hit the horn button with the palm of his hand, rather than with a finger tip or thumb. Not a big deal, actually if he didn't mind the look of an old style horn button attached to the edge of the air bag (so it didn't interfere with the air bag operation) it could work just fine.

       Now Bob, being Bob, talking was his gift, and finding somebody with a little military background, and stuck in the driver's seat of his car was all he needed to tell one of his stories. Bob hopped in the back seat and leaned over to watch what I was doing. As I worked on his new horn button, he told me all about his time in the Marine Corps. Fascinating story; I could have listened for hours. In fact, I made sure I took long enough for him to tell his story in full and without any interruptions.

      He told me about his time in Korea, in Inchon actually. It was a cold winter when he was there. A bitter cold wind and heavy snow was only part of the horrific condition he had to deal with. He went on in great detail how he was just a young kid who didn't know a thing, and how you would be talking to someone one minute and the next minute the fellow Marine sitting right next to him froze to death. When he told me that part of his story I had to stop and turn to him to ask, "That really happened, just like that, Bob?"

      With a stone cold look on his face he said, "As sure as I'm sitting here talking to you, my friend."

       I don't think he was kidding. He was dead serious, but it was as if he was telling me a story from a distance, but at the same time, a story where he was actually there in the mountains of Inchon still fighting the bitter cold. I think it's a way for time and age to allow a person like Bob to separate themselves from what was probably a terrible event in their life. I certainly have never experienced some of the things he was telling me about, like the chow, the hours of watching for the enemy, or how his boots didn't have much in the way of insulation, so you put on as many socks as you could along with any straw or grass you could find. Bob made a point to tell me that if you needed to run to the "head" (bathroom for all you none GI type) … well, you tried to wait as long as you could, because exposing yourself in that kind of cold could be the end of you… and I don't mean just "your" end that's exposed.

      I finished up my little project and gave it a try. It worked just fine.

     "Hop up here Bob, and see if you can make it work like this," I told him.

     Bob made his way into the driver's seat and gave his new horn button a try. A gleam came over his face, beaming from ear to ear. He had to try it a few more times, and each time the smile kept getting bigger and bigger. "Don't you know I needed that horn! Mercy, there's some little kids in my neighborhood who get out in the street to play, and I just want to toot my horn to let them know I'm coming. Thanks partner, ya done me right."

      The old Marine got out of his car and opened his wallet, "How much do I owe ya?"

      "Bob, it was an honor to do this job for you. I can't take a thing."

      "You most certainly are, Marine!" he said to me as he palms a twenty in my hand.

      "Thanks Bob, I appreciate that, but I really appreciate the stories. You know I write a column for a magazine, and I think I'd like to tell your story if that's OK."

      "Sure, not a problem. Go right ahead. I think I'd like that."

       You don't shake hands with Bob, because of his crippled hands; his way of shaking hands is to "bump" knuckles. Good enough for me. It's the thought that counts. Then Bob turns to the car sitting in the bay just in front of his car. With whatever strength he had, he did his best to straighten one finger and point at the car in front.

      "I'll never get over seeing this," he said.

      It was a Kia Sportage in for a no start condition. I made the assumption it was because it's a Korean car, and I thought it must be bringing back some of those painful memories he had as a young man.

     "I understand where you're coming from Bob, it's a Korean car. I understand completely; it's something your generation had to deal with on the battlefield where your friends had died. I'm sorry it brings up some bad memories for you."

      "That ain't it," he said as he walked closer to the car, and pointed directly at the name branded on the back door, "Killed – In – Action."

      I think my knees buckled a bit when he said that. I didn't know what to say next. Bob waved good-bye, and pulled his car out of the shop, and tooted his horn as he made his way down the street.

      I see old Bob once in awhile, still driving the same car, still tootin' his horn. I don't think I'll ever forget his story of how he served our country. He's one of the last of that generation, a much simpler time, before computers, before cell phones, and when KIA stood for only one thing.

      I'm proud to have served my country, I'm even more proud to have met a great man like Bob. We should all be as lucky, and we should all remember what his generation and many others have done to keep this country free. So the next time you see a Kia, think of it as something other than a car, think about my friend Bob. Then, say this to yourself:

Semper Fi, Bob, Semper Fi

Thank You Uncle Sam

Before we had so many federal mandates and EPA regulations, cars and trucks were belching out gobs and gobs of environmental pollutants, and occupant safety was just a thought. At first, Uncle Sam wanted crash tests, tire tests, and seat belts. In the 70’s it was the crash bumper debacle. Then the emission systems came along with their smog pumps, miles of vacuum hoses, and EGR valves. All these “improvements” on the family car forever changed the way mechanics serviced them, and it also brought one more thing… the check engine light. Today, with even more state of the art innovations such as drive by wire, variable cam timing, and a whole lot more… well, let’s just say, “It ain’t like it used to be.”

When the first check engine lights starting appearing on the early 80’s models the light wasn’t taken very seriously by most consumers. It was treated just like the old “idiot” lights that were common on earlier vehicles. Unless the car was over heating or making some terrible noise from under the hood, a lot of people would ignore it. But, as time went on that little service light’s job gained more and more responsibility. Soon, the little “Service Soon” light took on a whole new meaning than it did back then. Originally, there were just a few codes. Most of the original codes were only two digits long and could be accessed with a paper clip or a grounded connector. Now, there are four or even more digits per code, and there are hundreds and hundreds of them, and not just for emissions anymore. The paperclip days are all but gone, these days most codes can only be accessed with a code reader. Even the code readers themselves are different from one to another. There are code readers that can only read generic codes, the kind that are for those federal regulations, and then there are code readers that will read manufacturer specific codes. It all depends on the quality of the code reader and who manufactured it.

The service light was never intended to be the golden answer to what was the problem, but merely a direction or description of the symptom in regards to emissions. While the importance of that little light has far surpassed the original intent, retrieving the information has changed drastically. Since the check engine light has taken on such a variety of duties, this has led some people to believe that the glowing light on the dash is the answer to all car problems. And, yes, there are “code shoppers” out there who are looking for a bargain for interrupting those codes. Leave it to those national discount part stores, the ones that sell every part from A to Z, to come up with a marketing plan to get people to shop at their stores… free code reading for the consumer.

Sure, give somebody something for nothing and they’ll jump right on it, but seriously… do you really get anything for free these days? You drive up to one of these places, they send some guy from behind the counter out to your car with some nickel and dime code reader, who then plugs it into the car and checks to see what code is stored. Rather than have it diagnosed any further the code is deciphered into what component it is referring to, which just happens to be one of the many parts they sell. Ya might as well buy the part while your here, right? Makes sense doesn’t it? They read the code for ya, and they’ve got the part too! How much simpler can it be?

And I’m sure some people are thinking, “Ya don’t need a trained technician with several years of schooling and OJT to figure out these new cars, heck no… a guy at the parts store can do it.” (Apparently I’ve been doing it the hard way all these years. I guess there’s no need in attending all these advanced classes, or buying these expensive scanners to diagnose the modern car, my bad.) With all the regulations, emission controls, safety features and electronics on today’s cars, apparently they’ve made the cars easier to repair. This is where I’d like to thank Uncle Sam for his superb effort of protecting our fine citizens from harmful emissions on newly manufactured cars. But, after the original sale is over, it’s obviously not that important to all the guys and gals in Washington.

I think it’s ironic that the same people who pass these laws to make the car a much safer form of transportation and environmentally friendly than ever before, are the same people that can’t see a problem in leaving the consumer to believe anyone with a code reader is qualified to properly diagnose these vehicles. I’m sure this would start a debate with some congressional committee that it is the consumer’s choice in how they chose to have their car repaired. I understand that not everyone can afford OEM original parts, and I’m not saying there are not great aftermarket parts that far exceed the OEM requirements… there are. I’m just not sure the general public has any clue as to the variety of cheap second rate components that are out there at these discount part stores. Uncle Sam in all his wisdom hasn’t seemed to notice that all their legislation for better cars just flies right out the tail pipe once the consumer makes the decision to have substandard parts installed. Which leads back to that little check engine light and how it has become not a reference for a repair, but in some people’s minds… it IS the repair.

There are a lot of states that require a full inspection including the service light to be in tip top shape before it will pass, while other states don’t have a thing in the way of inspections. (I guess our elected officials think those emission fumes stop at the state lines.) I’d like to think these part store code readers are actually helping the consumer, and I suppose in some way they are, but not every time. My biggest problem starts after a consumer has tried the free code read and tried the cheap part, and it still hasn’t fix their car. Then they end up at a professional shop, and what do they all say at the service counter? “I’ve already had it checked out.” This of course, causes even more issues at the counter. Now somebody has to explain to the owner that codes don’t fix cars, mechanics fix cars; codes are just one small part of finding out what needs to be done.

I’d like to tell Uncle Sam just how much I appreciate his involvement in creating a better car, a better environment, and a much safer driving vehicle. To all the congressman, senators, committeemen, legislators, and politicians, you’ve done a fine job so far. Although, it might be time Mr. Politician, to check your own service light… I think it’s on.

Frustration

It’s early in the morning, time to get ready for work, the morning breakfast and the obligatory cup of coffee are down the hatch, dogs fed, paper picked up, time to go. You make your way to the car, hop in and turn the key…crank, crank, crank… the whirl of the starter motor is all you hear. What now? What a way to start the morning. Your knowledge of cars goes about as far as the key in the ignition and where to put the fuel in. Panic sets in. It’s one of the many frustrations of modern life that has just become a part of your morning.

In your panic mode you can picture all of your plans for the day are going to be ruined. Immediately you start dialing the phone. First you call the boss and tell him you’re having car problems, then a call to the guy in the next cubicle to see if he can give you a ride to work. Next you call the wife and tell her the good news. Of course, she reminds you that you’re supposed pick the kids up from school and to take them to soccer practice, and you’re supposed to pick up your suit from the dry cleaners on the way home today. Today is not your day, and the frustrations just keeps piling up. All because the car wouldn’t start.

The first tow company you called is backed up with other calls, so you try the next one. They can make it in about an hour. Then you finally make the call to the repair shop. They’re backed up too; they can’t get to it until later today or possibly tomorrow. Your voice starts to show signs of frustration as you talk to the service writer. (Believe me, the service writer can tell.) Then in a fit of desperation you ask the service writer, “Is there anybody else who can get to it quicker?” The service writer hesitates for a moment, gathers his thoughts and says, “I’m sure there is sir, but let me see what I can do about getting you into the shop a little quicker, but no guarantees.”

You’re first lucky break of the day. He’s going to try to squeeze you in. Ok, things are looking up for a change. Your frustration level drops a notch, but not by much, you still have to figure out what to do about soccer practice, the dry cleaning, and how much is this all going to cost. At least your ride showed up to take you to work… work, I almost forgot… gotta go.

You’ve made it into the office, but you’re still worried the repair shop won’t get to your car soon enough. Even though it’s only been an hour or two, and for some reason the original conversation with the service writer about the possibilities of squeezing you in were slim seems to have slipped your mind. You figure now is a good time to call them, and see what they found out about the car.

The service writer you spoke to earlier doesn’t answer the phone this time, but a different one instead. Your frustration leads you to believe you need to go through the entire explanation of the problem all over again, even though the guy on the other end of the phone said it wasn’t necessary, because he has your work order in front of him with everything you told the previous service writer. The service writer tries to explain to you that the car has just arrived, and it will be a bit longer before they can make room in the shop for it, but your stress level has almost reached its maximum. The frustration keeps mounting as you plead with the service writer to get your car in as soon as possible, which only puts him under even more of a strain than he was before you called. Mainly, because you fail to realize… you’re not the only one whose car isn’t running.

The two service writers converse, and decide to push this one through the shop a bit quicker. Now the frustration has passed from the customer, to the service writer, and then ultimately to the mechanic. The service writer taps the mechanic on the shoulder, who is busy reading some scanner information on another problem car. The service writer says, “Hey Hank, can ya put that stuff down for now? I’ve got a rush job for ya.” The service writer stands over the tech, nervously tapping the work order into his open palm as the mechanic mumbles something under his breath, and slowly puts the scanner down and takes a look at the work order.

“Yea, fine, leave the work order with me, and log me in on it. I’ll get off of this one and start on it,” the mechanic tells him as he writes down a few reminder notes as to where he left off on the car he’s currently working on. The mechanic then heads out to the lot with the keys and hops into his new “rush” job for the day. He turns the key, VROOM the engine starts. More under his breath comments come to the surface. The mechanic drops it into drive and pulls it into the service bay. After a few regular checks, codes, fuel pressure, gas level, battery connections, etc… the results are… “Unknown failure. Cannot duplicate the no start condition at this time. Advise the customer that we can either keep the car for a few days, and try it off and on, or they can keep track of it and let us know.”

Now the mechanic is frustrated. Pulled off of a job that has a legitimate no start condition to an intermittent “rush” job that doesn’t seem to have one. Now the frustration starts back up the chain, from the mechanic, back to the service writer, and of course, ultimately back to the customer.

The car is started periodically all day long, up until the time the customer comes to pick it up. Frustrated, angry at the situation, and more than a little upset that the shop couldn’t find the problem the disappointed customer drives off. The next morning the service writer calls the customer to see how things are going. “It started just fine this morning,” the customer tells him. “Great,” said the service writer, “I’ll check in with you for the next couple of days and see how it’s going.”

Finally, it wouldn’t restart, and stayed that way long enough to get it checked out. An intermittent fuel pump and relay was the problem. Nearly three weeks after it all began, the frustration finally ended for everyone. This fast paced, modern world we live in can be frustrating when all these modern conveniences fail to cooperate. Dealing with the stress of it all is different at each level, and it’s hard not to get frustrated over such things. But, it sure would be nice if we could.

Hacks

Two cars pull up in front of the shop. (The drivers didn't come in; I heard all of this from my office window. Maybe they didn’t realize that sound travels.) The boyfriend opens the hood to his girlfriend’s car. They both stare at the engine, she tells the boyfriend that she was supposed to drop the car off for an engine miss by some part store that told her to come here. So all she wanted was a ride home. The boyfriend mumbles how he knows everything about cars and there's no reason to go to a repair shop, and how these repair shops are just going to scam her. Then proceeds to tell her all about his great mechanical skills along with some very crude specifications that "these guys" (the repair shop I guess) wouldn't know anything about them. (Can’t say I’ve ever heard the term “donkey power” before. He probably meant horse power but, she bought it… he’s the expert you know.) After about a half hour in front of the shop they got back in their cars and drove off. The more I heard the funnier it got and the less automotive savvy he made. The last thing he said was, "I'll stop at the super discount part store on the way home and pick up the parts I need, and if they don’t have the right stuff I’ll just make it work."

Warning – Warning Hacker Alert!

I’ll bet there will still be something wrong when this guy gets done, and that “something” is going to be a hacked repair job. It’s not just the all-knowing boyfriend hacks out there or the crazy uncle with a toolbox, it’s also the fly-by-night mechanics that seem to pop up from time to time who take a stab at repairing a broken hose with a coffee can and pipe cleaners, or use some old plumbing parts for an exhaust pipe. Somewhere, at any given moment, some hack is trying to super glue a plastic section back onto the intake manifold, duct taping a hole in the air cleaner box, or blocking off the rear brakes with a plug in the master cylinder so he doesn’t have to deal with changing out the rusted brake lines that are buried along the frame. Then he tells the customer, “It’s fine, you don’t need rear brakes. There overrated anyway.” Or, the body shop guy who adds a few extra drywall screws to the front grill or fender and then blends them in with a layer of bond-o and paint. Looks great until rust sets in or the next guy has to take off that grill to fix the hack job they left underneath it. (Yea, been there…)

I’ve seen globs of body putty inside fender wells, two wires twisted together with household electrical wire nuts, different sized threaded nuts jammed onto ball joints, to a distributor welded to the block. The list is endless. It just boggles the mind at some of the ludicrous ways some people have attempted or should I say “accomplished” some unorthodox repair on a car. Bailing wire, aluminum foil around a fuse, bathroom faucets for radio knobs, a 2X4 wedged between the block to keep the alternator belt tight, and if 6 butt connectors within a foot of multi-colored wires ain’t enough for ya … add 2 more scotch locks and 3 more wires, now you’ve got a class “A” hack job!

By the time these hackers get done chances are the cost of a proper repair has just gone sky high, and in most cases if the owner would have brought their car to a reputable shop in the first place they probably could have saved money in the long run. If I was given the chance I’d like to take some of these cracked socket heads and stand them in front of all the guys in the shop just like in one of those old Technicolor westerns of a Calvary outpost. You know, the scene were the slacker solder is in front of the formation and is being reprimanded by his superior officers. One officer reaches over and rips the insignias off of his uniform; another officer takes his rifle and yanks all the military chevrons and buttons off. The now “x” soldier is stripped down to nothing more than a tattered shirt, torn trousers and a pair of boots. A command is shouted out and a small squad of armed men march this now defrocked solder out of the open gate. I personally would offer my services to remove any insignias and all these slacker-hackers tools and march these wanna-be mechanics right out of town with a squad of mechanics shouldering their very large torque wrenches as if they were rifles just like in one of those old westerns.

Every trade has their hacks, but for some reason the automotive field has a few extra ones compared to the rest. It could be the number of cars out there, or the lack of any agency watching over parts sales and installers. This might dictate the overwhelming number of poor decisions, bad planning, or just pure ignorant wrench spinners out there. I’d bet some of these hacks started out in their driveway slappin’ parts on the neighbors cars for pocket change, (Diagnosing and repair ain’t part of their procedures.) and when they couldn’t get the problem solved correctly they resorted to shoe strings and bubble gum. When it doesn’t fix the car, the neighbor, being neighborly, won’t say a word to them. Instead, they bite the bullet and pay to have it repaired at regular shop. (So much for saving money huh?)

Years ago, most of the working trades that you could get into right out of high school, didn’t require much in the way of advanced training. Things like, brick laying, carpentry, electricians, plumbing, mechanics, painters, heavy equipment operator, etc. You would start as a helper and work your way up as the boss seen fit. If you showed up for work every day, on time, did what you were told to do, and got along with the rest of the crew, before you knew it, they let you try your hand at it. That’s still true in a lot of trades, and it’s still true for the mechanic/body shop trades as well. However, times have changed since then, and more advanced issues confront the modern mechanic. The automotive field has become a technical nightmare of electronics and advanced engineering. Now, more than ever, hacking a repair together only means a comeback or worse.

I suppose, as long as there are screws, clips, nuts, bolts, and tools at the handy dandy department store, somebody is going to tinker around with their car and hack it up. Job security for the professional mechanic to say the least. I guess I should be saying thank you to all those hackers out there. They make a lot of extra work in the shop, but to be honest, I’m still shaking my head wondering how in the world ya do ……… what ya do.

Serengeti

Out on the Serengeti a lonely lioness is stalking its next meal. Crouching down in the tall grass she keeps a close watch on a herd of wildebeest passing by. At the end of the long procession a weak calf that appears to have lost its mother is barely keeping up with the herd. A perfect ambush and a quick strike will keep the other wildebeest from interfering with what the lioness is going to do. She has studied the terrain, judged the wind, and has found her bargain for the day. From here out it’s up to nature to take its course. Will the wildebeest be the next meal for the lioness and her cubs or will it escape the claws of the huge lion?

In nature, it is generally considered that the strongest will survive, or at least it seems that way. I tend to think of it in a different way. In nature, the opportunist has the advantage. We all shop for bargains, we’re all opportunist in a way just like the lion. In the concrete jungle bargain hunters come in all shapes and sizes, but we are all after one specific thing… price. We search thrift stores, auctions, garage sales, box stores, and buy at a discount, even auto parts and services. But a bargain is one thing, weak knock-off automotive components is completely different.

The lioness out on the Serengeti shops with one thing in mind, and that’s hunger. The bargain automotive shopper shops with one thing on their mind as well, and that’s price. A weak, second grade component is the most likely choice. The lioness searches out the weak so it doesn’t have to work as hard, while the bargain shopper buys the weak component because it’s cheaper. Snatching up some of these bargains can have some side effects too.

As I watch these automotive bargain hunters on their quests for the cheapest deal, I’ve noticed they seldom take in account their cheaper part is lacking something… “quality”. A lot of parts come from the same manufacturer, but not all the components are built to the same specifications. It could be a weak version of the original, it could be a part that barely limped its way through quality control and ended up in the back of the pack. There’s something that makes it a cheaper buy and not just because it’s at the discount store. We all know… cheaper parts are cheaper for a reason, but during the frenzy search for the bargain those thoughts are forgotten.

It could be the quality of the part wasn’t up to the quality level for a certain manufacturer so that particular piece was sent along its way to the next wholesale bidder down the line and put on the shelves at one of the discount parts stores. That’s where you’ll find the bargain hunters looking for a replacement part. Keep in mind, the quality part on the top shelf has a price to the end consumer which is not (obviously) what the manufacturer sold it to the store for, and there are several ways to buy quality parts and avoid the different markups as the part goes from wholesaler to wholesaler and store to store. A cheaper part on the shelf starts out the same way… so…how much lower was the price when “it” left the manufacturer?

Being in the repair business I see a lot of discount parts day after day. They usually coming in from off shore manufacturers. Places like Singapore, Malaysia, Korea, China, and several others. Years ago one of the most common components I would run into was the external regulators on the Fords. If you took a good quality regulator and placed it next to one of these bargain brands you really couldn’t tell the difference. But, pick them up, you’d know. The cheaper one was as light as a feather, while the OEM (Original Equipment Manufacturer) part had a bit of weight to it. These days it’s fuel pumps, HVAC control heads, window motors, engine parts, body parts and more that keep showing up as the weak link. Body shops have complained about these second rate components for years, now it’s creeping into mechanical/electrical repair side even more than before.

Again, it’s simply price, not quality that the bargain shoppers (Insurance companies too) are looking for rather than a top of the line components. They assume it will work just as well as the OEM part… but it hardly ever does. Unlike the lioness that takes what she gets and waits for the next opportunity some of these bargain shoppers in this wide expanse of the concrete jungle get rather irate over the cost of repairs or replacement parts. (Sometimes I think I’d rather deal with the lioness instead.)

Let’s face it, we all like a bargain, and when we find one, we all like to tell everyone about it. Next thing you know there’s a stampede to the parts store. Cheap car parts have been a mainstay of the automotive repair business for as long as I can remember. They’ve made me quite a living replacing cheap parts for good ones. Sometimes I feel like a game warden, part of my job as the professional mechanic is to distinguish between those weak parts and the good ones.

East to west, and north to south the herd of cars run up and down the nation’s highways, traveling along like a wildebeest at times. A little traffic jam here, and a little mishap there. It’s all in the nature of things. So the next time you’re buzzing down the highway amongst all the other cars and trucks, just ask yourself one question, “Is that bargain part I installed really all that great?”

You might want to slow down, and get to the back of the pack… just watch out for the hunger lion… they can spot the weak ones.

A Visit from a Retired Shop Owner

An elderly customer came to the service counter one day and asked if I had time to check his car out. I asked him what was wrong with his car, and his reply was more than revealing. It was a text book answer, just what a service writer or mechanic would like to hear. His reply was precise enough to inform me of what was going on, without any of the usual hype or meandering/misleading stories that are common. Every Tech and Service Writer has heard things like, how the car used to be blue before it was repainted or how the problem started after leaving their friend’s house, or when the left rear tire went flat. Not this guy. I asked him what the problem was, and he promptly gave me the answer… nothing more, nothing less.

I wrote down the symptom and headed out to the shop to do what I do. As I grabbed the keys I told him, “I’ll see what I can find out.”

The customer nodded his head, and told me he’d wait in the lobby for the results of the tests. No odd questions, no stories of what the last guy did, or any “while ya got it could ya look at this”. In all my years of diagnosing cars it’s rather rare for someone to know that the first thing in any repair procedure is to find out what’s wrong, and not just ask me what I “think” it is before spending money on a diagnostic procedure. He seemed to know what I was doing and knew that I’m not just “looking” at the car as some people put it.

I finished the diagnostics, and headed up to the waiting area to inform him of the results. He listened intently as I explained what I had found out. Then he asked, “I take it the short fuel trim numbers indicated a lean condition? Did you run a power balance test? It’s starting to sound a bit like an intake air leak at this point, did ya find it?

I said, “Yes, I ran all those tests. It led me to a collapsed PCV hose that also had a huge slit in it on the back side of the throttle body where you couldn’t see it. The short fuel trim numbers did indicate a lean condition. I confirmed the short fuel trim readings by spraying a bit of carb cleaner down the throttle body to see if the numbers changed. They did.”

“Yep, that would do it,” he said with a smile, “Sounds like you’ve got it. Easy fix from this point. That sure would change the stoichiometric value, wouldn’t it?”

His questions and reply’s weren’t the usual type of responses I get from the usual customer. This guy was different. There’s something behind all of his questions and answers. This is something that I’d like to diagnose as well as the car. Nobody that I know of ever comes to the repair shop with the correct response. Nobody that I know of ever comes to the repair shop knowing the ideal tests that are needed, and nobody I know of ever understood all the technical stuff I throw out.

I had to ask, “Say, you seem to know a few things about diagnosing today’s cars. It’s very unusual that somebody comes here and knows which tests are going to track down the problem. But you seem to know a lot more than the average guy, how’s that?”

The gent sat up a little straighter, smiled and said, “I retired about 20 years ago, and before that I ran a small repair shop east of here for about 35 years. I still keep up with all the new technology and enjoy working on cars, but the old eyes and knees can’t take it anymore.”

Wow, a fellow mechanic and shop owner… I’m impressed. Of course that started all kinds of conversations about cars, repairs, customers, mechanics in general, and life under the hood. His stories were so remarkably close to what I’ve seen in my 30 years that it put a smile on my face as well. It’s safe to say I found a new friend. Later we got into what it takes to own and keep a shop going. His insight was interesting to say the least. But, I did have this one nagging question I was dying to ask.

“What do you think is the most important attribute to get customers to come to your shop and not somebody else’s?”

He had a one word answer, “Luck.”

Now I have even more questions.

“What’s luck got to do with it?” I asked.

“Luck is what you have. Luck is what gets them in the door. When you have a new customer’s car in the shop, someone you don’t know, or has been referred to you, and you diligently diagnose it, make the repair, and settle up the bill. What is the one thing they all tell you just before they walk out the door?” he profoundly asked.

I didn’t have a clue what he was getting at.

He went on to tell me, “They all say, “I’m going to tell all my friends about you, and I’ll recommend you.”.

Then he asked me a question, “Now, how is it these folks are so darn sure what you’ve done is so good that they’ll recommend their friends, even before they checked what you’ve done? Their perception of the repair is based on what they’ve heard you say, and not what you’ve done. If you’re like me, every job is done with the same care as any other job. But, it still comes down to what the customer thinks of the whole thing. Good work, a good shop, and a good attitude are very important… but a little luck doesn’t hurt either.”

His explanation went on, “In other words your work doesn’t speak; your accomplishments in the shop go unnoticed. Because for a lot of people what they are after is trying to find a good mechanic, and when you do something for them… luck is in their favor. We’re not perfect and even the best mechanic will get stumped once in a while, and even if you make things right it’s still their perception. A perception that isn’t about you…or me…but mechanics in general. Most people think all mechanics are just wrench turners and nothing more. They don’t see the hours of education and study we put into knowing how to do this job. A lot of people feel that a guy with a few wrenches in his driveway can accomplish the same thing as the professional mechanic… and that makes that driveway guy just as much a mechanic as you and I in their eyes,” he proudly proclaimed.

As quirky as it sounded and for even quirkier reasons… it all started to make sense. I guess after all the years he had been turning wrenches he had a great deal of luck too. It was a great conversation with a retired mechanic that day, and I felt pretty lucky to have met him too.

Greener Grass

You’re washing up after a long, hard day. Your shirt tail hasn’t stayed tucked in since lunch time, and everywhere you look there are more oil stains and dirt on your clothes from working on that last engine. Then the service manager shows up wanting to know why that last job isn’t finished, and asks if you can stick around a few more hours to get it done. You’re about to blow a gasket, but you keep your cool, and call home to tell them you’ll be late again.

Between the car problems, that lousy air hose fitting that blew apart, and that last repair order you got that listed the customer’s complaint as: “Car don’t go.” You’ve had enough. You slam the screwdriver drawer shut as you say to yourself, “I’m going to quit. I’ll find another way to pay my bills. I can’t take this anymore.”

Even the guys and gals coming out of technical schools wonder if this was the right choice. Most of them have the same worries: “Can I find a job? Will it pay enough?” Everyone wants to get out there and do what they were trained to do, and the road from just being a lube tech seems so long and narrow that the thought of changing careers creeps into the conversation.

I’m sure at one time or another we’ve all thought about trading in the toolbox for a cubical office job. There’s such an investment in training and tools that you have to wonder. “Is it all worth it? Is there anything else I could do? Is there greener grass somewhere else?” If you listen to some of these motivational speakers they’ll tell you, “Don’t follow your passion - follow the money. Your passion may be the thing you love to do, but money makes the world go around. Life’s too short to train and become an expert, go where the money goes, do what pays the best!”

Then the question is asked, “Is there any money to be made in this trade, or am I just fooling myself? Should I start thinking about a different line of work?” Anybody who’s been around a while will tell you the real money in this business is for those who have the knack and the temperament to deal with the ups and downs. If you’re the type of person who finds mechanical things fascinating, or an automotive related TV show entertaining, or an old restored ride rumbling down the road makes you strain your neck for a better view…well then, you’ve got a passion for things mechanical.

I’ve known a lot of guys who left the trade for one reason or another and then eventually came back to it. Now why is that? Why would you hang up your wrenches, and then decide to come back to it later on? I thought the pay was terrible, the working conditions were too rough, and the training was too much? It’s probably the same reason why you’re reading this. It’s in your blood. Cars, boats, trains, heavy equipment, etc… those mechanical wonders that make the industrialized world move progressively forward into the future are part of your make up. Ya can’t change who you really are. Money may change how you’re involved with all things mechanical, but I’ll guarantee you’ll still find room for them.

If you check the average income for technicians across the country the figures are simply appalling. Who in their right mind would invest thousands and thousands of dollars into personal equipment to repair something that needs such a highly skilled person to properly repair them? Only to be put at the bottom of the list of important contributors that keeps this society on the road? Yep, the mechanic knows that scenario all to well.

I tried to figure out how they arrived at these income figures. From what I could find out the national average is based on every facet of the automotive world. From the lube tech, tire shops, muffler shops, brake specialty shops, and various dealership/independent shops. I find their results rather misleading.

If they did the same analysis on the average salary of a chef they’d find the same huge differences between them as well. Just as it is in the automotive field there are different levels of compensation. The person who preps things in the kitchen is just as much a chef as the person whose name is on the door. So why are there so many variations in income levels?

Its training and your expertise that makes the difference, you’ve already got the passion for it. Gee, the three things some of those so called expert motivational speakers tell you to ignore. So if the main reason you’ve thought of changing professions is based on an average salary…think again… your passion may win out in the long run. Now all you need is that training and expertise.

This trade is like any other trade… with one exception. Not all you know today is going to help repair the cars of the next generation. You have to constantly learn something new. Training is what is going to make the difference; it’s a never ending pursuit of knowledge on new technology, procedures, and tools.

Just remember that passion that got you started. It’s still there. Learn as much as you can about your trade, learn it well, and be the best that you can be, that greener grass may be a lot closer than you think.

Gerdie

A lot of guys and gals in the trade will have a special project in the back corner of the shop or at their home garage. It’s in our DNA to make things mechanical go. Some are into dirt track racing, the drag strip, power boating, snow machine, or many of the other forms of engine snarling, testosterone filled adrenalin sports activities. Then there are those who are interested in restorations projects. While others spend hours upon hours carefully and artistically creating their own unique work of automotive art.

I got into air cooled VW’s. Restored a few and showed them at different shows, even won a few 1st place trophies and a few best of shows too. Sadly, the VW passion subsided a long time ago and all those cars are gone now. Like a lot of these restoration or testosterone filled hobbies, at some point in time they wear a little thin and you move onto other projects. However, for me, there is this one old truck that I never got rid of… and that’s Gerdie.

Gerdie, as my daughters affectionately named it, is a 1984 Toyota 4X4 extended cab pickup. I bought it second hand when it had about 5,000.0 miles on it. It was in perfect shape and it was just the size I needed. These days it sports a few small dents here and there and a few cancer spots as well. It has slowly aged from shiny and new to dull and drab as the kids and the rest of the family grew older. This whole story is a result of me rummaging through some old photos and I ran across one of my two daughters standing in the bed of the truck. I think they were just 4 or 5 years old then. (They’re in there mid 30’s now.) (My son on the other hand, well, he doesn’t even want to be seen it. Says it’s not cool.) It does have that old car funk and it’s definitely no show winner, but I like it just the same.

The paint faded years ago and a lot of the primer is showing through these days. The original 22R engine gave up years ago, dropped #2 cyl going home one night. A few years ago it was the transmission and somewhere between the engine and transmission problems I had to find a replacement rear-end for it.

When I bought a brand new full size pickup old Gerdie became the shop work truck. And, like most shop trucks it got used and abused. We used it to haul parts and old junk engines and transmissions to the scrap yard. Half the time nobody would strap things down and things would slide around bashing into the sides of the bed as you would stop or take off. Mechanically, we kept it in shape, beyond that nobody gave it a second thought; it was just an old truck and nothing more.

Every little ding and crinkle has its own unique story to tell. Most of them I put there myself. With the exception of a few that is. Nothing major mind you, well… there is that wrinkled front right fender that I’m not taking the blame for. That’s my wife’s fault. She was teasing me with some licorice one afternoon at the shop (years ago) she took off running around the shop giggling, so the chase was on. She rounded the corner outside the front office with me in hot pursuit. I didn’t make the corner; instead I tripped and did a header into the fender just above the center section of the wheel arch. Crushed it in pretty good too! I never changed the fender, I just hammered it out the best I could and left it there as a reminder of why I shouldn’t chase the wife for candy. Come to think of it… I didn’t get any of that licorice either.

For years it was strictly the shop truck. Then we decided to move out into the country for a different life style than in the city. Gerdie took on the job as the all-weather 4X4 vehicle, and boy… has it come in handy. These days with gas prices the way they are the old truck makes regular trips back and forth to the shop almost every day. (Beats filling up the big V8 fuel tank in my other truck.) The old rust bucket gets a few stares on my 35 mile commute to work when I’m bounding along at 70 mph, like I said, it’s no show winner; it may look like crap but it runs like new.

The big thing about this old truck when it’s sitting out in front of the shop is not that it’s my old truck that I’ve personally owned for 30 years, it’s actually my statement piece of what can be done. Just like the show car that somebody built by hand or the racer building their perfect machine. Old Gerdie becomes a way of telling my customers just how long you can actually keep one on the road if you really set your mind to it. Most of the time, when a car reaches a certain age, neglect becomes its only friend, and everything starts to fall apart. The oil isn’t changed, that little rattle is left go, or the coolant leak it’s had for quite some time is forgotten about. (That is until the next time you drive it and forget to bring the jug.)

In fact, a lot of times it actually helps make a sale just to have the old heap of iron sitting in the parking lot. Oh sure, there are those that look at it and turn their nose up. Some will quote the old cliché, “It’s a mechanics car, and you know how it is… the worst car is always owned by a mechanic.” I just smile, while they are standing at the counter getting their car checked in and say, “Mine runs and drives, what’s yours here for?” (Snicker, snicker)

As it is, I think I’ll hang on to the old truck a while longer. Maybe it’s the memories of all the trips we’ve taking in it or the stories behind each of those dings. I’ve been asked many times why I don’t restore it. You know, turn it into one of those “back in the corner of the shop” restorations jobs.

Nay, you’d cover up all those little dents and the memories along with them. I think I’ll keep it just the way it is.

Learned Attitude

Attitude, it’s something everyone has. Some good, some not so good. Some people can keep it in check, while others have no regard for anyone else and just let their emotions fly. You know the type of person I’m talking about, sure ya do, ever been to a hockey game and the guy sitting behind you is yelling at the referee? Yep, that’s him. That’s the guy I’m talking about. And, it’s those same kinds of attitudes that make their way to the service counter as well.

There are other reasons for some people’s unfortunate circumstances that bring on a different type of attitude too. I think every service writer or mechanic tries to be understanding and be forgiving for their life’s problems. They range from, “I’m a single mother, I’m a senior citizen, I’m not from around here, I just lost my job, etc… etc… etc….” In the short and long of it all, what they are really trying to say is, “Give me a break!” To be perfectly honest, I do have a soft heart for those who are having a rough time financially, but the bottom line is I can’t make that my concern when I’m behind the counter. I’m here to do a job, to do it well, and to get paid for it just like anyone else who works for a living.

Speaking of working for a living, there are a so many jobs out there that you never deal with the actual person who is paying for your service or product. You get your paycheck on a Friday, show up on Monday, and start the whole process all over again. Me, my paycheck is the cars that come into the shop, and who’s cars are they? Why it’s the single mom, the senior citizen, the out of towner, and the guy who just lost his job, etc… etc… etc….

Last week it was a 25 year old car with a sixteen year old driver with a serious need of an attitude adjustment. He told me he didn’t know a thing about a car, (keep that thought handy) and that he was only sixteen. More than once during his explanation of what was wrong with the car he had to mention how old he was, and how he didn’t have a lot of cash. Hey, we were all sixteen once, and I can understand about the lack of funds as well as the lack of knowledge about a car. Honestly though, being sixteen doesn’t make any difference as to the cost of a repair? It is what it is. But, he seemed to think it should.

This poor old gas guzzler he was driving was well past its prime and had more than a few problems. There was already a new alternator and belt installed from another shop and it was obvious some recent work had been done. But this brash youngster was bent on pinning the problem on someone besides this aging hunk of iron. He even went as far to tell me that he knew the reason it wouldn’t start is because he spent all his money on the alternator. (He knew huh? Really… figured that all out with your pocket book aye? That’s an excellent way of determining what’s wrong with your car… NOT!) I told him we needed to check things out first.

The battery was up to a full charge and the engine cranked over just fine, but there was no spark. The crank sensor has failed. This lead to a lengthy description of what a crank sensor does. (Hey, he’s learnin’ something. At least it’s a step in the right direction.) This eventually led to installing one. VROOOM! It started. A few quick checks on that new alternator output showed that it was doing fine too.

At this point it’s time to send him on his merry way. But, I did manage to slip into the conversation and on his invoice about the condition of the rest of the car. Everything from the whining fuel pump noise to the groan of the power steering pump. He initialed the ticket, and then I looked him right in the eye and said, “You understand you’re going to have problems in the future. This car has seen a lot of road time so be expecting to put a few more bucks in it if you’re going to keep it running.” He nodded his head and was out the door in a flash.

About 2 weeks later the phone rang, yep you guessed it…it’s the young driver with a car that won’t start. He was practically screaming in the phone. Of course, it’s all my fault and he’s positive that the part I put in has failed. (Hmmm, sounds kind of familiar doesn’t it?) And, just like last time I have to hear the part about being sixteen and no money. Then he dropped a bomb shell on me. “You guaranteed it would start, well it’s not! So you’re paying for it!”

By now, I was getting a little hot and I thought it was time for me to fire back at this youngin’. “First off, you don’t need to raise your voice, it’s just a car. Second of all, your warranty covers the part not the entire car. That is why I made sure to let you know that I could see more things going wrong than what was wrong with it the day it was in here. However, I’ll check it out and let you know what needs repaired. If it is the same part that has failed it’s covered under the warranty.”

With what little info I could get out of him, (between his screaming fits) led me to believe the fuel pump had just died. I wasn’t sure where this was all going end, but this kid had me so steamed that I had to ask him the one question that I’ve been meaning to ask all these “screamers” that I’ve ever had to deal with on the phone.

“What makes you think you can get anywhere by yelling at me?”

His answer, “My mother told me to yell at you guys (mechanics) because that’s the only way you guys will fix it for free!”

Seriously, your mother is teaching you the fine art of pissin’ off a mechanic? That’s just great… absolutely terrific… Way to go mom!

It all makes sense now; I’ll bet that’s just how the next generation of loud, obnoxious spectators is created at the ball park too. Dad takes boy to a ball game, dad yells at the umpire or opposing team, then son grows up to be just as obnoxious as his old man. I often wondered how these types of individuals kept popping up. Never put a thought to it being something they were taught by their elders, now I know. I really should have asked that question years ago.

Ya learn something new every day; just wish some people would learn a better attitude.

Multiple Answers

You’re at the emergency room, you’re left arm is swelling up, pain relief is a priority. The initial diagnosis involves a few x-rays and checking your vital signs. The nurse writes down all the information on your chart and then places it by the door of the exam room so the doctor can read it. The doctor enters the exam room already flipping the pages of information, and takes a seat on the little stool. The doctor introduces himself, “Hello, I’m Doctor Smith,” with the formal introductions out of the way the next question is usually in regards to the information on the chart and his initial evaluation. He asks, “So, how’d ya break your arm?” Without hesitation, you go into a detailed explanation of how it all happened. In some case the story is very important to the diagnosis, while other times it’s just another one of those typical stories the doctor has probably heard before. Never the less, they’ll listen. (I think they call that “bed side” manner.) When your tests are done, the cast is applied, and you’ve got a few pain meds prescribed, it’s off you go to home sweet home.

Now what in the world does a trip to the emergency room have to do with cars? Well, nothing, and everything at the same time. If you’ve ever stood at the service counter and was asked, “So what’s wrong with the car?” you might find this interesting. Just as the doctor asked when he entered the exam room there is a few primary questions to answer at the service counter. At the emergency room it’s all about gathering pertinent information about the problem and it’s the same at the service counter. There’s no doubt even at the ER the answers to the questions can be jumbled up and misleading as they can be at the service counter.

The service writer isn’t asking, “How you broke you’re car.” But, “What’s wrong with the car.” For some people answering that question with, “It doesn’t shift, or the battery is dead every morning” isn’t possible. They somehow start in the middle and work back to the beginning of their story, and then finally to the real reason why they are there. I’m still baffled at the answers I get on these occasions, and just like the ER doctor, listening to the various replies takes a bit of patience. Sometimes I have it… sometimes I don’t.

Let’s face it; I fix cars not people. If I could ask the car directly I probably would. But, as it is, the car can’t speak. (Yet) In the meantime, standing at the service counter and deciphering the bits and pieces of information from the owner seems to be the best way. Needless to say, at times, there’s a lot of piecing together be done.

Granted, a lot of people don’t know the first thing about cars and with the internet full of suggestions and friends with more than a cursory knowledge of the modern automobile the confusion at the service counter can be overwhelming. I hear all kinds of wild and exotic solutions and explanations about car problems when I’m standing at the counter. All this random information might seem important, when in reality, most of the time, less = more.

The other day I had an encounter at the counter after asking the usual question, “What’s wrong with the car?” It was definitely one of those multiple answer and confusing explanation type of situations. I generally keep notes as people are explaining things to me. I was going to need a lot of scratch pad on this one.

The owner began with, “It doesn’t start every once in a while.”

Our conversation covered the typical reasons for an intermittent no start, which also brought up the diagnostic hassles with this type of problem, and the problems of trying to find intermittent issues.

“As long as I can duplicate the problem I can fix it,” I told him.

“Oh, you won’t have any trouble with that,” he answered, “It does it all the time.”

Now that’s interesting, before it was once in a while, now it’s all the time. I think I’m somewhere in the middle of this story right about now… I hope we get to the finale soon. Cross out intermittent and below that write “does it often” on the scratch pad.

“That’s slightly different from what you just told me. When you say all the time, do you mean once in a while or do you mean,” holding my fingers up for quotations, “all” the time?”

He answered, “What I mean is, it’s doing it more often now.”

“That’s great,” I said with a smile, “I’ll be able to find the source of the problem much easier now. Let’s get it into the shop as soon as possible and run a few tests.”

“Super, I’ll get it towed in this afternoon,” he cheerfully replied.

“Wait a minute,” I answered with a questioning tone, “Why a tow truck?”

“I’ve tried to start it every day for the past 2 weeks and it still hasn’t started. That’s what I’ve been telling you. It doesn’t start.”

I checked my scratch pad, several pages of jotted notes, turn back to page one, cross out “does it often” below it write D.O.A. It’s just another round and around story at the service counter.

I really wanted to tell this guy. “What if we started this whole conversation in reverse? So when I ask, “What’s wrong with the car?” You say, “It hasn’t started for the last 2 weeks, but before that it was intermittent at best.” I should have, but I didn’t. Would have made a whole lot more sense that way and probably would have saved a few pages of that scratch pad too.

Of course, there are the ones that have to lump everything and anything that has ever gone wrong with the car into their present story. (You’ll need a lot more paper to jot these stories down.) That simple question of what’s wrong becomes a dissertation of every little bump or bruise the car has ever had. And, they have to throw in every shop that’s worked on it and every part that’s ever been changed. Is it important? Well, kind of, but probably not as important as what’s wrong with the car now.

Ya just gotta smile, and go on. If it makes that particular customer feel better to tell every little bit about their car by all means… tell your story. Whatever way you’d like to tell it is fine with me, and it doesn’t matter about the multiple answers you have to the question or what order you want to tell them. I’ll try to keep up and sort out the important parts. Don’t worry, I’ve got plenty of scratch pads and pens. Will it change the outcome of the repair? Nope, not a bit. But I’m sure, just like any emergency room doctor will tell you too; these stories sure do make for an interesting day at the office.

The Best of the Best

Overland Park Convention Center, Kansas City, Missouri is the place for the Vision HiTech training convention. I try to attend every year, take some classes, browse the expo, and meet up with some old friends. Classes range from Hybrid service, scope and scanner reading, diesel and gas engine drive-ability, to shop management. Some of the top instructors gather at this convention and put together some of the best classes I’ve ever attended. Whether it’s your first year or your 40th year in the repair business you’ll learn something new from attending the Vision HiTech convention.

My first class was on hybrid battery servicing. Really great stuff, lots of insight on what is involved, the theory behind the technology, and how to properly recharge, discharge and tests each cell separately. Most of the classes were all day, the morning half was lecture and familiarization with the tools and specifications while the afternoon session is actual hands on. Exceptional information and instruction.

I also sat in on a scope reading class, diesel diagnostics, and spent some time in the hybrid diagnostic class. Every one of them was top notch. Then, with time to spare, I made the rounds through the expo and talked with several vendors and suppliers. Lots of things to see, from tires to tools to demonstrations, there was something there for every form of automotive repair.

Every aspect of the classes, seminars on future technology, luncheon speeches, live pod-casts, and “think tank” discussions panels was well received and attended. But, for me, not only was the expo, the seminars, the class instructors, and the various college level instructors from across the country that were impressive it was the guys and gals that swing the wrenches down in the service bays from across the country that were just as impressive.

These are the guys and gals that have taken on this thankless job as a career. Sure, we all have those customers that really appreciate what it takes to do this job, but it’s sometimes hard for some people to comprehend the amount of ever changing knowledge a person has to retain to be a professional mechanic. Most of the time, the general public doesn’t have a clue as to what it takes to be a professional mechanic. These guys and gals do.

This convention brings out the cream of the crop, and those individuals who are seeking to become a better technician as well. These are the individuals, shops, and service centers that want to do a better job for their customers. One thing is for sure, you don’t go to one of these conventions to learn to be a parts changer, this is the real deal, this is the type of convention you attend to become one of the best of the best.

An email I received said it best. “I learned a lot at the convention and now I’m back at my job and have to deal with all of these not so educated guys from other repair shops all over again.” What I believe he meant to say was there are so many variations of the word “mechanic” out there that a lot of people just lump them all into one term... “Mechanic”. (It almost sounds like a four letter word to me when somebody is at the service counter and says, “My friend already told me what’s wrong, cause he’s a mechanic just like you.”) In my opinion, what they are really telling me is there “mechanic” either doesn’t have the tools to perform the necessary repair, or they have never taken any training on how to perform the repair. (Or they ran out of parts to swap.)

These are the “mechanics” (there’s that four letter word again) that give the rest of the auto industry a bad name. Parts changers, guess-and-go repair shops, and the preverbal, “I had the codes checked at the parts store.” (Codes are NOT parts people!)

For the guys and gals attending these training conventions it’s all about learning or updating their skills, not about changing parts. Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t mean that if you didn’t attend you’re not one of the top notch mechanics out there, heck no... If you’re reading this then you obviously are thinking along the same lines as the guys and gals that had the opportunity to attend the convention, and I’ll bet you probably would have liked to have gone but for whatever reason you weren’t able to. I’m talking about those “mechanics” that don’t attend, don’t read the latest technical articles and procedures, don’t keep up with the technology and don’t want any part of learning up to date practices because they either think they already know everything or are to dang stubborn to think somebody might know more about it. (You’re never too old to learn something new.)

The other part about attending conferences and conventions like Vision is the “meet and greet” side of things. Think about it, you’re at a convention where likeminded individuals are in attendance, you’re on common ground. They understand the daily grind, the diagnostic and tool issues, the grease and grime, and what it’s like to deal with every aspect of trying to make a living from the underside of a hood. Each and every one of them has a story to tell, and it wasn’t uncommon to see techs from different parts of the country get together at the nearest watering hole and swap their latest stories. When the evening came to a close, every one left with a new found respect for their trade, themselves, and the other attendees.

So there’s a lot more going on at these conventions than classes and sales pitches at the expo. It’s a place for the best of the best to meet the rest of the best of the best. I’m never disappointed after spending a few hours with some of these guys and gals at these conventions, and I plan on continuing to do so.

Until we reach a point in the far reaching future where all this car knowledge can be surgically implanted or is taken over by some weird futuristic robot control, attending a few classes to increase your knowledge is one sure way to keep up with the best of the best.

What if Yogi was a Mechanic?

For those who never took an interest in baseball, let me tell you about one of the greats. Lawrence Berra, better known as Yogi. He played almost his entire professional career (1946-1965) with the New York Yankees. After his playing years ended with the 1963 World Series, he was hired as the manager for the same team. Yogi was known for his uncanny way of covering the strike zone (as well as outside of it) with extreme reaches or golf club style swings for low balls. As a catcher he made running down those foul balls look easy. He even managed to have more home runs in one season than strike outs, which made him the go-to clutch hitter in a tight game. (Only 414 strike outs over his entire career of 7555 at bats.)

Berra, may have been one of the most outstanding players of all times but what he’s most noted for is his mangled quotes, such as "It ain't over 'til it's over", while speaking to reporters. His reputation for obscure quotes didn’t go unnoticed by the great Yogi Berra himself, he once stated, "I really didn't say everything I said." For me, and I know I’m not alone on this one. There have been times I’ve blurted out the wrong answer or said something that just didn’t come out right to a customer. You know, you’d like to take it all back, but what you end up trying to do is correct your latest flub without making it any worse.

Now with Yogi, well, it was his nature to say things that just didn’t seem to make sense. You sort of knew what he meant, even if it didn’t sound right at first. I sometimes wonder if he knew he flubbed a statement to a reporter and wishes he could have taken it all back. Most of the time, he would just throw out another off the cuff quote that would go down in baseball history with the rest of his jagged quotes of quotes.

What if instead of career in professional baseball Yogi was an auto mechanic or repair shop owner? Can you imagine the quirky quotes that would have been possible? Here are a few actual quotes from Yogi that all you have to do is imagine him standing at the service counter telling a customer just how it is. Just add the word mechanic, automotive, wrench, or any other phrase that comes to mind that would fit in one of his famous quotes instead of being baseball related. I’m sure it’ll put a smile on your face.

“You can observe a lot by watching”

“The future ain't what it used to be”

“If the world were perfect, it wouldn't be”

“We made too many wrong mistakes.”

“A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.”

“If you don’t know where you’re going, you might end up some place else.”

“Half the lies they tell about me aren’t true.”

“90% of the game is half mental.”

"I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early."

"If you can't imitate him, don't copy him."

"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."

"I take a two hour nap, from one o'clock to four."

"I made a wrong mistake."

"Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel."

"Think! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time?"

"You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."

"Nobody goes there anymore; it's too crowded."

"It ain't the heat; it's the humility."

"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."

"90% of the putts that are short don't go in."

"Do you mean now?" – (When asked what time it was.)

Yogi Berra's second claim to fame is by far for being one of the most quoted figures in the sports history, and there’s no doubt why. I suppose somewhere in the world of automotive there’s a Yogi Berra type individual with the same gift of gab. In the meantime since I don’t where that guy is Yogi will do as a great substitute.

I even find myself slipping into a Yogi’ism when I least expect it. You know, the old foot in mouth syndrome when you’re trying to explain something to a customer and you get all tongue tied and what you wanted to say isn’t really what you said. Yea, I’ve been there… done that. I’m sure Yogi had a quote for a situation like that. Thankfully, there are no cameras and reporters around to record all my flubs and guffaws like old Yogi had to deal with. Me, I’ll just dust myself off and eat a little crow while I apologize and rethink how I’m going to properly say what I wanted to say. It’s not first time that I’ve had to back track something I’ve said, and I’m sure it won’t be last time either.

Like Yogi said to a reporter after a game, "This is like deja vu all over again." Hopefully we can all laugh at our own flubs and take things in stride just like Yogi did. Cause ya know, “It ain’t over till it’s over.”

Cart Before The Horse

The phone rings at the repair shop, “How much to change the thermostat in my car?” the caller asks.

I can’t even begin to count how many times someone has called me and asked about the labor costs on a particular job. There are a few questions I’d like to ask before spouting out a number, but I usually hold those thoughts back a bit just to see where all this is leading too. My questions are:

1. Are you comparing a price from what the last shop quoted you?

2. Are you looking for a cheaper repair?

3. Are you just curious, or is calling repair shops for labor prices a recreational hobby of yours?

4. Are you guessing at what it needs, and the actual problem this car is having has never been properly diagnosed?

Nine chances out of ten, it’s number 4. This creates an even bigger problem for the repair shop. Now the question is should the repair shop give the quote as asked, or find out what the symptoms are and diagnose accordingly?

I’ve tried various different ways of handling these situations. None of which are a perfect answer. Sometimes I just look up the quote and move on, and sometimes I’ll ask if it has been previously tested by a qualified repair person. Sometimes, I’ve even asked, “What were you quoted before?” Each and every response I give generally tests my fortitude. What seems to be the norm is not if you’re qualified to perform the repair or have the right equipment to actually make the repair, but are you cheaper than the last guy who quoted the price. As far as getting to the real issue of what is wrong vs. taking that “swag” (Scientific Wild Ass Guess) approach, they seem to prefer their own diagnostic abilities. This only leads to more confusion, frustration, and disbelief in the auto repair person or shop when you question the reason for the quote.

It seems for some of these callers, their diagnostics consists of asking around, checking the internet, or asking a friend who’s a “mechanic” (we all know that guy) what is wrong with their car. They would rather take the word of someone who is not familiar with the car or the related problems, and change parts that probably don’t need changed rather than pay for any diagnostic time to find out what’s really wrong. But, you know after leaving the repair shop that provided them with the lowest bid for the repair… and their car still isn’t functioning the way they perceived it should, they almost always come up with their own conclusion (Again)... “Mechanics are all rip offs, and they don’t know what they’re doing.”

Self-diagnosing doesn’t work with the medical field, nor does it work in the automotive field. Sure, you might get it right once in a while, but the majority of the time the self-inflicted diagnosis is way off base. The big issue at the repair shop is how to get past this false diagnostics and get to the real problem, without having a major melt down of the customer/technician relationship.

The other day it was a father who came into the shop asking for prices on replacing a ball joint and shocks on his son’s truck. It didn’t seem too farfetched of a question based on the type of truck, the age, and the mileage. So, I shot him a few prices for the labor, which he then told me he would supply the parts himself (dad works for a parts supplier) . Fair enough, even though I would have liked to have known that before I priced out the job. But, no big deal, I still haven’t seen the truck, so all bets are off as to whether or not this is going to happen.

A few days later, just before closing, the phone rang and it’s the son calling about his truck. It turns out he doesn’t really know what his truck needs, and he’s been doing his own price shopping. He told me another shop quoted him a cheaper price than what I gave him, so he wants to know if I would lower my original estimate. Seriously, you want me to lower my labor costs based on the fact that - 1 - you don’t even know what’s really wrong with the truck, and - 2 - somebody quoted you lower prices? Let’s just say, I wasn’t all that hospitable. I told him it would be advisable to have it checked out first, then get estimates on what really needs done. After you know what work really needs done, then you can start your price shopping again. I told him the way he’s going about it I might as well give him estimates for every type of repair I can think of that I’ve ever done on that type of truck, and then let him pick which ones his wallet can handle. Because, it’s not worth it for me to play “his price vs. my price” without knowing what in the world actually needs done. Needless to say, I still haven’t seen the truck.

Putting the cart before the horse just doesn’t work in this day and age in the automotive world. To ask for a price quote is one thing, but to think your guess is correct is about as good as following the so called labor “guide” as the absolute answer to the cost of repairs. Here’s the deal, thinking that all it could be is a bad thermostat, and asking for a quote on replacing it just because there’s no heat in the car is as foolish a way of diagnosing a problem as putting on a blindfold and throwing a dart at a wall expecting to hit the right answer. There are so many different possible failures that can cause no heat in the passenger compartment that it’s absolutely idiotic to lump it all into a stuck open thermostat without having it tested first. The same thing applies with just about any other automotive repair these days. Aside from going out to the car one morning and finding a flat tire most everything else about the modern automobile requires some sort of evaluation, and not a mere guess or a peek under the hood.

I wonder if back in the day of horse and buggies whether or not the local blacksmith had these same issues to deal with. Even then, if the cart made it to the repair shop before the horse I’m sure some novice would have their own “swag” as to why it happened. Times have changed, the buggies have changed... but some people still put the proverbial cart before the horse.

What Ya Know

It’s rather hard for me to remember a time when I didn’t know a whole lot about cars. Of course, there certainly was… had to be. It’s not like I was born with a wrench and a test light in each hand. Like a lot of mechanics who started long before me, most everything you know about this job was from experience and handed down knowledge from the older generations of techs. There weren’t a lot tech schools back then, so it really was OJT for the most part. You started as a kid pumping gas at the local gas station, and hung around under the lifts watching what the mechanics were doing. Eventually one of them would hand you a wrench and tell you to take something apart. And, as they say… the rest is history.

I don’t see a lot of summertime gas pumping jobs anymore, or much of a chance to hang around at the local garage as I did when I was a kid, so getting a start in this field is a little different than in the past. Even though on the job training is still just as important as it was so many years ago, now most of the training is through technical schools. They’ll start you off with the basic fundamentals, and then bring you up to speed to the service requirements and skills needed on today’s cars. The likelihood of jumping straight out of high school into a good paying line tech job just doesn’t happen without some background in it first. Technical school training, training conventions, or on the job training is the best methods I can think of.

Even with all of that, when you do land that lucrative job you still have a lot to learn. Well, actually the learning never ends. New procedures, new products… new…new…new, always something new. But what about the old stuff that creeps into your service bay from time to time? That’s where a different knowledge source is needed. Who would know about a 30 year old carburetor system or vacuum controlled HVAC? I know who, the senior technician. They’ve seen it, done it, turned that bolt, and know what it takes.

Ever since I was the young gun in the repair shop the scuttlebutt talk was always about how there is a shortage of skilled technicians out there. Some say it’s a lack of interest, the working conditions, the pay, or it could be the stereotypical “mechanic” that the high school guidance counselor described, while he was pushing you to go to college rather than a trade school. (At least that’s the way it was when I was in high school.)

I get quite a chuckle out of listening to some of the younger techs that I run across at trade shows, schools, or by email. They have a different type of “smart” about them. They’ve got a very modern approach to the automotive diagnostic process, with web based information, computer testing, and the like.

Being a skilled mechanic/technician then, and even more today, isn’t something to be taking lightly. Not everyone is cut out to be in it or stay in it, and the ones who do should be commended. It’s more than nuts and bolts, it’s computers systems, data lines, and sophisticated state of the art electronics. It truly is a knack; it’s a talent, some got it…some don’t.

There’s so much to know in this field compared to just a few decades ago that a lot of technical schools try to focus on what is on the road today vs. what used to be on the road. There just isn’t enough class time available to cover all of that. So, a lot of those old carburetor systems have fallen into the history books.

Besides, a lot of those tweaks and little fudges that were needed on those bygone car systems are handled with computer software these days, such as dwell and timing, fuel enrichment, and transmission shifting. Each decade of cars has their own set of weirdness to them. It’s something you had to experience, and experience is what the older tech generally has more of.

Just the other day I received an email from a young tech who was working on a 70’ model GM that was belching gobs of smoke out the tail pipe. He was very thorough with his diagnostics, and had all the facts and figures in his email. (He really did a nice job.) I asked him if it was an automatic, and if so, pull the modulator off the transmission, and see if there was any fluid in the vacuum hose. He did, and sure enough there was. If he kept digging around, I’m sure he would have found it in an old service manual, but after all the years I’ve put under a hood… I knew what it was just by the way he explained it. It’s one of those things that isn’t on the younger techs’ radar to check, mainly because that type of problem went away with the introduction of the electronic transmission.

That’s the kind of thing I’m referring to. Before the advent of the electronic age, most car repairs and adjustments were done with hand tools and timing lights. Each successive generation of mechanics, before my time and certainly after, have had to deal with their own variety of different problems than the next generation.

It’s a different kind of smart these days for sure. I still get a kick out of listening to the younger generation techs talking about how they don’t understand a carburetor, or how we even got those things to work. You’re right, and it was definitely a different time back then, a completely different world than we live in today.

I’m very glad to see the interest these students have at several of these technical schools I’ve visited. With a little guidance and some time under the hood these students will be tomorrow’s exceptional technicians. They really are trying to put the best possible mechanic into the work force. The days of starting on the lube rack and working your way up to top tech may still be possible. Even then some guys figured out it wasn’t for them, but before these young guns make it through tech school, they’ll know whether or not is was the right career choice. As an old coach use to tell me, “Practice doesn’t make you perfect. Perfect practice does.” And, there’s no doubt starting off on the right foot at a school is a whole lot better than learning some bad traits.

I’d still pay attention to those old guys in the shop. They’ve been at it a long time; they know things about using certain tools, or short cuts that only comes with a lot of time under the hood. Some of which just can’t be taught out of a text book. Only years and years of turning a wrench does that.

They already know, and then you’ll know.

Judging by the Cover

It’s a busy day, the bays are full, the phone keeps ringing, the front door bell never seems to stop, and everyone is humming a tune. It’s a picture perfect day at the auto repair shop. Parts were ordered, and surprisingly enough every part came in correct the first time...every time. No snapped off bolts, no rusted parts that needed more than the usual persuasion to get off, and not one fuss with how long things were taking, or how much it costs. I’d like to keep that mental picture for a while, because it doesn’t happen that often in this business. Somehow, some way, there’s going to be a loose nut thrown into the activities of the day.

Two new jobs showed up at the same time. A really nice, clean, 07' F350 4WD diesel with an ABS light on, and a really dilapidated 97' KIA with charging system problems, with no light on. The big diesel lumbered into the service bay after the usual explanations of the diagnostic charges. The owner was enthusiastic about having his truck checked out. Why, I’d even say he seemed rather proud about the whole thing. Its text book diagnostics procedures, run a few tests, check the codes, hook up the scanner and watch the speed sensor PID’s. Piece of cake.

On the other hand the same explanation of the diagnostic charges was given to the owner of the 97' KIA. That didn’t go over as well... at all. Seems the KIA had been around the block and around again. He has had it checked out at various shops, which ended up with the owner ticked off and no positive answers to his cars problems. It took more than a little effort on my part just to get the owner to allow me to diagnose the problem. He finally said yes, and handed me the keys.

The little car was in the front parking area off to one side, away from the other cars. The paint was faded, the clear coat was peeling, and the windshield was full of splinter cracks. The dull and faded hood had greasy hand prints all over the front edge where people were grabbing it. That was just the superficial first glance, it gets better. I grabbed the door handle to open the door, it didn’t budge. About then, the owner leans out of the front office door, while waiting for his ride and said, “Ya gotta lift it up pretty hard and then jerk it open.” I waved “thanks” to the owner and gave the door a good yank, it creaked and moaned as it swung open. The interior of the car was a pit. Cigarette butts everywhere, papers, fast food cups, and trash littered the interior. The smell was oppressive. But, I said I’d look at, and after all the commotion and persuading at the front counter I wasn’t backing out now. I’m bound and determined to diagnose this problem, even if I have to wear a gas mask to do it.

The little KIA ended up in the bay next to the big diesel with the ABS problems. Both vehicles didn’t take long to diagnose. The diesel was just a faulty front speed sensor, while the KIA had two problems. A faulty alternator and a strange problem with the instrument cluster. The charge light wouldn’t come on. Since this car has an alternator that is controlled by the PCM, the charge light is just there to indicate the condition of the charging system to the driver. (It can charge just fine without a charge light in working condition on this particular car). The only thing to do now was to write up both estimates.

I was so sure the big shiny diesel job would be a “do”, so when I called in to get prices on the parts I told the parts supplier to go ahead and send the speed sensor, but to hold off on the alternator. I just couldn’t see the KIA getting done. Next step, inform the customers. The call was made to the owner of the diesel. When I explained the results of the test and the estimate for the repair, instead of getting an OK as I expected, what I got was an earful of what this guy thought of mechanics, the automotive repair business, and how we (mechanics) are all just a bunch of rip offs taking advantage of hard working people like himself. Really? And to think, he was so eager and obliging to have it checked out and now this? I don’t know if it was the price of the repair or this guy just flipped out. There was no repairing the damage to my ego, or this guy’s distrust of the auto repair biz. It pretty much knocked the wind out of my sails. I hung the phone up knowing this job wasn’t going to happen.

Discouraged and a bit downhearted after the last phone call I took a deep breath and made the call to the KIA owner. I went through all the steps needed to bring his little car back to life, including the part about how I would have to pull the instrument cluster out and see what’s going on as to why the charge light wasn’t working. I was expecting this guy to flip out but, to my utter amazement, he said, “Do it. Do it all. You’re the first person to make any sense out of what’s wrong, and I think you’re the man for the job. I expected it to cost a few bucks. Just call me when it’s ready.” I was still in shock as I hung up the phone. Here’s this rundown, grease covered car that I wouldn’t put a plugged nickel into, and this guy is having me do the whole thing, while the owner of the exceptionally clean diesel is on this rampage about how rotten car repair people are. Go figure.

I guess it just go goes to show... “Ya can’t judge a book by its cover, or an owner by his car.”

Details

Like most professions, automotive repair relies on good information. Preciseness is a must. If the manual shows a tolerance for a gear back lash or specific timing for an engine, the person holding the wrenches is going to do his/her best to obtain those values. It’s not only the values, but the descriptive nature of the components that’s just as important. If two techs are talking about a solenoid or a sensor, the terms and nomenclature are important for their conversation. This is true in just about any type of job or hobby. Getting the description of a component or procedure correct is all part of the communication. But, that doesn’t hold true with the novice or misinformed customer. Trying to sort out what is a real problem and what is not, can be a terminology battle.

I know I’m not the only one who’s had to deal with the phone call or customer at the service counter who is trying their best to describe their problem, while throwing in some term or part name that just doesn’t fit their explanation. Now, if I try to explain something to someone I always will use the full name or common name for the component. That way I feel I’m not misleading them. They may ask several times, “Now what’s that part called?” and if that happens, I’ll try a little less professional explanation. Although, from the consumer’s side of the counter all bets are off when it comes to explaining things. I’ve heard it all. From headlamps being referred to as “light diffusers”, and a timing belt as a “clocking controller”, and of course, the ever popular… “relay switch”. There are thousands of odd terms out there, far too many for me to list here.

By now, you’ve probably got some sort of grin on your face, yep, me too. My wife on the other hand, tells me I shouldn’t stand at the service counter with that quirky little smirk when this happens. Honestly, after some of the escapades I’ve had, you can’t help but laugh. Just to prove a point, one night after dinner my wife and I were talking about a subject dear to her heart…quilting. (Which I know next to nothing about.) I purposely blurted out a mixture of two different terms I’ve heard her use, all in the wrong context just to see her reaction. And, right on cue she went into full out “giggle snorts”, which nearly dropped her to the floor with laughter. That’s proof enough for me. Whenever you’re talking to a pro, and you try to sound professional and don’t… the giggle snorts are automatic.

This also includes jumping into an explanation for one problem, and then abruptly asking a question that’s completely unrelated or absurd. How do I handle these absurd questions? Easy, I have an absurd answer to go along with it. Of course, I’ll try to correct their misguided information, as long as it doesn’t go so far off base that it turns into a lesson in automotive repair rather than trying to fix their car.

Just the other day I got a call from a guy who told me this interesting story. He said after installing a new battery the headlights wouldn’t work, the park lights wouldn’t work, and it wouldn’t come out of gear. As his description of the problem continued, my little mechanic brain was already hard at work zooming through the wiring diagrams of that particular car and surmising the possible problems, when all of a sudden he blurts out an entirely unrelated question that stopped my thought process dead in its tracks.

“Do you think it’s the security system?” he asked.

Ok, good question… sort of.

A quick rethink of the theft and starting system on that type of car, I answered him, “Does it start?”

“Yes, but I can’t get it out of park.”

Knowing the circuits I could deduce it’s not the security system, so I answered his question like this, “No it’s probably not the security system. I’ll bet you have an open circuit either from something you left disconnected, a blown fuse, or fuseable link.”

“What’s a fishable link doing in my car?” (Did I say that?) That’s a new one. (I’ve got that smirk on my face again.) He kept repeating it even after I tried to correct him. For some people it’s from misguided information, or sometimes it’s a homegrown interpretation of how the car works. Sometimes they just don’t comprehend what you’re telling them. It never ceases to amaze me how many times somebody will call a component by some homemade name, or twist a problem they are having into an indescribable adventure into some weird world of automotive jargon.

Maybe it’s me… maybe I’m trying to be too precise. But, I can’t think of any other way to be, except to be as precise and to the point as I can possibly be. For example, the call I got about a 95’ Jeep that the owner claims to have ripped out “all” the wires. But, it runs fine, has a transmission problem, and the tail lights don’t work.

Aside from the short history lesson about his car, his only “actual” question was, “Do ya think it’s a coil pack?” Ok, for the layman a coil pack might as well be a widget. But, to the trained and seasoned tech the mere word “coil pack” speaks volumes. Again, that little mechanic brain of mine was trying to put together a mental picture of wires pulled out, a bad transmission, and no tail lights only to have this question about a coil pack come at me from left field. Now all I have is this “Rube Goldberg” image of what’s left of this guy’s car in my head. (For the record a coil pack is a device that produces the high voltage spark for a spark plug, and a are in pairs or multiple coils molded together to form a “pack”.)

His only question was whether or not I think it was caused by a coil pack. My answer to him, “Ah, no.” The more he explained his problem the more my diagnostic mind went into a tail spin with even more bizarre interpretations of unrelated issues. At some point it becomes a futile effort to either explain things, or try to make sense of what is going on.

Every mechanic has experienced these “questions” at some point. I for one, get a kick out of the absurdness and wacky explanations. If you can imagine spending a day deep in thought over a serious diagnostic problem with countless diagrams, software, and scanners, then end up on the phone with somebody wanting to know how much to put a helicopter landing pad on the top of their Yugo, then you can understand why your mechanic gets a case of the giggle snorts when you ask him that.

Sometimes it might be better just to tell the mechanic what the problem is and leave the diagnosing to the experts. The details are in the communication, the better the communication the fewer giggle snorts.

Self-helper

A well-worn Chevy pickup is left at the side of the shop one day. The keys were slipped into the drop slot with a detailed note. The note said, “I put a new starter on a few days ago, and now it doesn’t start at all, so I know it’s not the starter. It’s got to be an electrical problem.”

Oh, those famous last words of every weekend wrench bender/self-helper that I’ve ever had to deal with when their Saturday afternoon efforts fall short of their expectations. It’s never what they have just done, it’s always something else.

The story can be different, but they all have the same line to describe the problem with few details changed. You can pick yours from the list and fill in the blank. As the story begins with:

”I changed the part that……………… (Choose the appropriate response from the list below.)

A. My buddy said it was.

B. The parts guy told me it would fix it.

C. I read about it on the internet.

D. The last shop told me to change.

Or, all the above.

(Insert your choice of answers here) _______ ,so I know it’s not that.”

I doubt there will ever be a time that I’ll take their word that everything is OK. I’m going to recheck it anyway, if for nothing more than my own peace of mind. Most of these “self-helpers” will read their manual and follow directions to a point. But, when it gets confusing, or into a spot where they don’t have the right tool, or don’t understand the procedures they skim over that section and blindly go onto the next page. Books are great for information, but it still takes a bit of the artistry (if I dare call it that) to work with hand tools and the limited access on some of these problems. Call it my “OCD of automotive repair”, but I always figure it’s best to check things out when you’ve got somebody “helping” you with the repairs.

The next little tidbit of information left on the note is simply priceless. It said, “I left the manual open to the page you’ll need. It explains exactly what you’ll need to do to fix it.” Well, well… ain’t that just thoughtful of him, leaving the page marked for me. I’m grateful, dumbfounded, and perplexed as to why this is necessary. You’ve helped yourself to a manual, given up on the project, and feel it necessary to have the mechanic read the instructions! I’ve lost count how many times I’ve found an open service manual on the passenger seat with a note telling me where to find the proper information. I often wonder why they didn’t bother to look themselves. They had the page marked? Obviously they read the manual. So why not do a little more research and put those old, rusty tools to good use? Wait a minute… I got it; you’re only trying to help, must be that self-help concept coming through again. (Note to self: The next time I go to the dentist I’ll bring a copy of the instructions for him too. I’ll just lay them on my chest as he tilts the chair back. Of course the page will be marked so he can read up on how to do his job. I’m sure he won’t find it insulting either.)

The scenario continues. As of now the job of finding out what is wrong with this truck has been elevated from the household garage or apartment complex parking lot to an actual automotive repair shop. One with professional level tools, scanners, and diagnostic manuals. Exactly what kind of miracles will be performed in those catacombs of the service bay? It’s a mystery to all those weekend home garage groupies. I’m sure they’re all saying to their fellow backyard ratchet buddies, “Those guys charge too much, it ain’t that hard to fix cars these days. Why we could have fixed it if he would’ve left it here.” Yes, in some respects, it really isn’t that hard. All it takes is a few years of training, a couple of modern tools (Definitely not some swap meet-imported toolset that came in blister pack.), and the ability to think and reason through all the technical information (mechanical ability), and yes… a little less help from the rusty wrenchers with no experience from the house on the corner lot. Other than that… it ain’t hard at all.

There are generally two things that happen when the novice self-helper helps out. Either they are way off base on the problem/solution, or they’ve caused even more of a problem than they originally started with. It never fails. This little episode of “self-help” was no different. After checking things out (properly) the end result was a text book novice disaster. Number one: he used a cheap remanufactured starter that he over tightened the connectors on and stripped the nut to the solenoid. Number two: the starter signal lead on the solenoid was grounding out against the engine block from his failed attempt at reinstalling the starter. (Luckily this model had a fuse protecting the circuit.) Hey, he was right that it was an electrical problem. Although brought on by a little self-help.

After writing up an estimate (with a decent starter), I was surprised that he decided to have me make the repairs. Of course we had to have the usual conversation on parts prices vs. quality, and how you always get what ya paid for, and how the life time warranty offered for some of the discount brands usually means you’ll be changing it for a lifetime and not that it is better quality. And, how some weekenders will change the same part over and over until they get tired of doing it, and then step up to a better built component, or end up taking it to a repair shop. (That’s been my past experiences with them, although your results may vary.)

It was only after talking to him for a while longer on the phone that it all made sense as to why he was so eager to have a shop do the work. Apparently, there wasn’t enough “Band-aids” and beer for him to try and stuff the starter back in the hole a second time. He’s had enough of that “mechanic” stuff. Well, at least for now. I’m sure after his memory fades a bit, and his wallet is running a little thin, he’ll tackle another problem on his own. Why not, he still has the book!

When it he tries and fails he’ll park it next to the shop just like last time, with the same book on the passenger seat (opened to the appropriate page, of course), and another note telling me all about it. And then, we can start this whole scenario all over again.

An Average Day

My average day begins with the usual commute to work, the obligatory coffee, and the turn of the key to the front door of the shop. Unlock the overheads, do any morning paper work I have waiting, and get the day started. Monday through Friday it’s the same routine. Occasionally I’ll come in early or stay later than normal, but for the most part every working day has the same general routine, one day to the next, each month, and each year it all seems to roll on and on. Same front door key, same route to work, and usually the same brand of coffee.

When there is a chance to change things up it’s a welcome relief from the usual pace of things. For me, being under the dash or under the hood of the modern car is my comfort zone, and it sure doesn’t hurt for me to get out of my comfort zone from time to time. And, like a lot of people on the go day in and day out, that daily grind can turn into a snapping attitude to whomever comes near. I know I could use a little reminder now and then, that what I do for a living ain’t all that bad, and I owe my customers a great deal of gratitude for their patronage and for putting up with this snarly old mechanic. I guess in a way you take those average days in your own little comfort zone and forget there is more to what makes the world go around besides the next car you’re working on. Sometimes it might take a little nudge from an outside source to get you to realize it.

Recently I took a few days off and ventured out on a road trip with my wife to one of her “comfort zones”. Ok, I was “volun-told” by the wife, but I didn’t complain too much. (If you’re married…you know what I mean. She insisted that I go; said I needed a break.) It was three days of little old ladies, sewing machines, and quilts. Yes, quilts. My wife is a very accomplished quilter, and I know about as much about quilting as she does cars. I didn’t have any tools, scanners, or hoods to hide under with me. This adventure is definitely out of my comfort zone.

My wife was the guest speaker for this quilting retreat. Me… I was the “mule” for the weekend. Well over a hundred ladies with scissors, big fancy (expensive) sewing machines, and colorful fabric were on hand. They kept me busy carrying their machines from the parking lot to their respective class rooms. There weren’t that many husbands at the retreat, and the hotel staff had their hands full with all the ladies, so it was a logical choice that whoever was available became the next bell boy, minus the quirky little cap of course. (And no, I didn’t accept any tips.) If you ask the wife she’ll tell ya, “Oh, he fusses but he loves every minute of it.” (Sure, sure honey, whatever ya think is fine with me.) I wasn’t concerned about what she was telling them anyway, I just pulled my ball cap down a bit tighter, and ask the next little lady with a sewing machine, “Where do ya want this one moved to, ma’am?”

This led me to think of how it is when a non-car person makes their way to the automotive repair shop. The actual interaction with the service writer or mechanic can be intimidating for them. For me, a weekend with the wife surrounded by thread and quilts is just about as intimidating. Ok, maybe not nearly as bad, but those little ladies sure know just how to make a grown man blush. Especially when one of them asks me something about their sewing machine, or dare I say… ask me something about quilting. Look… I know what a PCM and a ball joint are, but I haven’t a clue what flying geese or half-square triangles are. And, these ladies loved to rub it in. Uncomfortable, yes, intimidating…well, that gets rather interesting to answer that one. Let’s put it this way, when these ladies stuck me in front of a sewing machine, and clued me in on which buttons to push to make this thing sew… yea…that was intimidating. They got quite a chuckle out of watching some big burly guy fumble around with a sharp needle trying to hold a thin piece of fabric with his big nubby fingers. Sooner or later one of them would push me aside and say, “Here, let me show ya how to do this.” I’d like to think that I can learn how operate any sort of machinery, even one of these ultra-expensive sewing machines…but these ladies…well, they’re in a league of their own. It’s going to take me a lot of practice to get up to their level. It’s pretty intimidating to say the least when they make it look so easy, and I can’t even figure out how to sew a straight line.

I’ve got to keep this in mind when I’m back at the shop. I should try harder not to be so intimidating, work on keeping things on common ground, and not so overwhelming for the customer, especially one who is feeling uncomfortable about having some stranger they just met work on their car. I certainly can take some lessons from those little ladies at the quilting retreat. They did their best to make me feel comfortable, even if I did have to endure a little ribbing from them, but it was all in fun. The real heart of the intimidation was trying to hold a conversation with them and not having a clue what they were talking about, or what they were doing. (Sounds like talking to some mechanics aye?) I got it ladies…thank you. Now the big thing is… can I turn this experience of what it’s like to be out of my comfort zone, and turn it into my average day? I’m sure going to try.

Cheap Cigars

Ok, I’ll admit it, I indulge in a cigar now and then, usually on the golf course, mowing the lawn, or on one of those slow days at the shop. All the cigars come in some form of a wrapper, box, or tube, but for the most part, at first glance, you can’t tell them apart. They all look the same. Some are like fine wine, while others could be compared to a well done steak; then there are those skanky-worthless-should’ve never spent money on type that smell something like moldy grass clippings rolled in rotted onions. Ask my wife, she’ll tell you they all smell like old gym socks that caught fire. (Out of respect for my dear wife I’ll keep from lighting any of them when she’s around… good or bad ones.) One thing I tend to do with everything that I’m involved with is to compare it to the trade that I’m in, cigars are no exception. And, in a way, choosing a good cigar is like choosing good automotive parts. As with stogies and car parts, there are cheap ones, good ones, super expensive ones, and some that are moderately priced.

Cheap parts and quality parts look entirely the same in their box or wrapper. From the average consumer’s vantage point the cheaper components most certainly will do the job vs. the better brands. Why? Price obviously. Although asking a pro which one you should purchase might make all the difference in the world. Those discount brands might come in a nice neat package, but it’s what’s in the package that counts. An expert would know right off hand which is a good discount brand, and which isn’t. Obviously, we all don’t want to over pay for anything, but we want to get the best value for our dollar. Hey, I’m the same way. Just as the old saying implies, “You get what ya paid for” it’s as true as ever…and always will be.

I’ve spent decades explaining the virtues of quality parts and service vs. subpar parts and service to clients and prospective customers. And, a lot of what I know is from experience. Some understand it, or have already been down the cheap road and ended up with that second trip back to the service center. Others, even with the best explanations given to them, still have to make that journey before the results and their wallet notice the real issues at hand.

Of course the other side of the repair business is when I’m asked to look at a car with a problem, and I find the problem is related back to one of those cheap parts someone else installed. One particular part that is extremely common is the ICP on the Ford Taurus (Integrated Control Panel). Since the radio and the HVAC are combined into one unit, it’s not uncommon to find an aftermarket ICP with an aftermarket radio in it. The plastic is brittle, thin, and breaks with just a twitch. Then there are the starters, alternators, blower motors, brake pads, and suspension parts that all have their discount brand versions. And, from first glance…in or out of the box…they look the same.

After a few decades and quite a few failed attempts with some of these off brands (not to mention a few new offshore brands just now coming in), I can tell the difference either by brand name, where it was purchased, or just the condition of it. (Needless to say, I’m learning the same with the cigars too…slowly of course.) Now, if after giving my little disclaimer to the customer about a cheaper part, and they still insist on the lower quality part, I emphasize a written disclaimer to go along with the repair. (Better safe than sorry…Mainly because I don’t want to be the recipient of the butt end of the cigar when the ashes start to fall.)

So the next time you’re confronted with the decision of whether to purchase a brand name component or a discount brand, ask the expert… your mechanic, before you lay out your hard earned cash. They’ll know whether or not you’re buying a decent part at a decent price, and not just getting a whole lot of nasty smoke in your face from a cheap cigar.

Rude or Incompetent

There's a point when all the communication skills and diagnostic theory just go straight out the window. Nothing you do will change or affect the outcome of the situation, no matter what you do. You’re at the mercy of the situation. I always go back to the quote by Will Rogers, “I never met a man I didn’t like.” I agree… except I don’t think Mr. Rogers was referring to the happenings at the service counter. It's not that I don't try to get along with everyone who comes in the door, but there are times that no matter what I do, we aren’t going to see eye to eye.

Could be a communication problem, could be one of us is not comfortable with the surroundings, could be my turn for a bad day…or theirs… who knows? To be honest, I'm not one to sit and listen to a long winded story of how they bought the car on a rainy Tuesday, or how the right rear seat belt hasn't worked, and the transmission sometimes doesn't shift, then this morning the battery went dead so they had to jump start...but… that’s not what they brought it in for… however… they thought I should know “everything”. How about we just get to the point and go from there. For some… that’s not at all possible.

And, if you ask, “So, what you want me to find out is why the transmission doesn't shift sometimes?” you probably just started a string of improbable conversations that will inevitably end with me being either called “rude” or “incompetent”. As with the following example.

They'll answer, “No, I need you to find out why the engine stalls. What ever gave you the idea that I wanted you to look at the transmission?”

“Cause you mentioned it right before telling me about jump starting it.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I'm talking about what you’re talking about.”

“I said the car died when I was driving it, and now the battery is dead. That's why the engine is missing. Apparently you're not as good a mechanic as my friend said you were.” (See… I reached incompetent pretty quick this time.)

Then there are the times someone will come into the shop and tell me somebody said to them that I give some sort of discount if they are a member of some car club. Or I have a “no charge” policy to check out their car for special customers. Huh? Really? Who? What the? How does this get started? Oh, and of course.... this leads to the “rude” side of things and another potential customer out the door. Even if I try to offer them some condolences for their misinformation their mind is made up, and since whatever it was they were told isn't happening, it’s OK for them to raise their voice and be demanding… because, well… I’m rude.

The biggest laugh I get is the typical type of “A” personality person who comes in the door and wants their car looked at “NOW”. Are ya serious? How, what, when, or where did ya ever get the idea that you could walk into a shop, doctor’s office, restaurant...etc... And demand something like that? I'm afraid to say it but, it happens a lot. I suppose it's this rush rush world we live in these days that some people think the world revolves only because they allow it to. I guess I missed the fairy’s dancing in front of you while they were lofting rose petals for you to walk on… sorry about that… please forgive me.

A typical situation happened just the other day. An elderly gentlemen came into the office asking about a brake problem he was having on a truck he kept alongside of his house. He uses it to pull a camper trailer, but he hasn’t used it in years. He wanted an estimate on bleeding his brakes, but before I could give him any kind of estimate he had to tell me all about the brake system on his truck. (Here we go…) I asked him what kind of truck it was. That led to him waving his hand at me as if I wasn't supposed to worry about things like that. He explained it to me, “This is a truck brake system that I’m talking about, and you don't know anything about those.” (Gee, I'm glad to know... that I don't know...so I guess without knowing...ya know, I probably can't fix it either.)

He went on to tell me, “I saw a leak around that little thing that you bleed the brakes from, so I tightened it up. I've also switched it over to DOT 4 brake fluid and added a brake aide to it.”

I said to him, “You've modified the brake system I take it? Dot 4 and some sort of brake aide? I'm wondering if the leak has been taken care of correctly. That could be the reason you need the brakes bled.”

“I didn't put Dot 4 in it, and I don't have any brake aide on it... those are for big trucks. Mine is a ¾ ton truck,” he stammers.

“You just told me you did,” I badgered back.

“No, I didn't. Are you having trouble understanding me young man? All I need is an estimate for bleeding the brakes.”

“What kind of truck is it?”

“It's a Dodge... and it has a small camper trailer that I've had for a while. Oh it’s a real nice one, and I use it all the time.”

“You told me you hardly use it, and that’s why it’s sitting alongside of your house.”

“No, I use it a lot when I need to. So how much to bleed the brakes?”

“If you're seeing brake fluid leaking odds are you probably need a lot more than just the brakes bled, sir. Chances are it could be a wheel cylinder leaking, and of course I'll have to check the fluid for any contamination. Which could lead to even more issues.”

“Oh, I see, Ok then, I don't have the truck with me. Can't drive it right now... brakes ain't working, I just need a price for bleeding them.”

“I could give you an estimate on the average time it takes to bleed a brake system that is fully functional and doesn't have any other problems, if that's what you'd like?”

“I'll bring the truck in so you can look at it and give me an estimate, as soon as I get the brakes fixed.” (Ah dah, isn’t that what you wanted me to fix?)

This is like the guy who drives his car to the shop because it won't start. I'm really laughing inside you know, even though I’m being as professional on the outside as I can be. I mean seriously… the car that you drove to the shop starts and runs fine… what am I supposed to do now?

A few hours later the brake bleeder guy is back.

“What can I do for you now?” I asked.

“None of the other shops would talk to me. They told me to get out. You're the only one who would even tell me what’s going on. So can you give me that price on bleeding the brakes now?” he asked.

I guess I wasn’t rude or incompetent enough… it never ends.

Drivin’- Drinkin’ and Grandpa

One of many slow days at the shop I had a small job come in from one of the local tire shops. This rather young girl brought the car to me from the tire shops just a few blocks away. She told me she was the owner and that the tire shop was rude and wouldn’t help her. I told her I’ve never knew them to be that way, but I occasional get like that depending on the reaction at the front desk. (Trying to lighten up the tension at the counter). She wasn’t much for my kind of humor, so I called the tire shop to find out what the deal was.

Her problem was that it would occasionally not start, nothing new, just another typical job. The tire shop didn’t want to get involved with this because it had a breath analyzer attached to the starting system. For anyone out there that hasn’t a clue what this is…, I’ll explain… drinking and driving should NEVER EVER mix, get caught, you’re probably going to have to blow into this ridicules thing to start your car. My opinion, if you get behind the wheel in a condition that would require having to blowing into a plastic tube to start your car, you are without a doubt the most STUPID, inconsiderate person of all times.

Don’t drink and drive!

Personally, I would rather see the driver’s license revoked and give ya a bus ticket instead. (Mandatory taxi/bus or signed sealed delivered notice that has to be approved by the court system from another driver any time you get into a car. Make ya prove you’re not the person behind the wheel.)

Beyond that, I need to find out why this car won’t start. First thing I did was disconnect the breath machine to verify if the problem was “factory” or the analyzer. Once the unit is disconnected from the car I have to call the 800 number on the device to let them know that it is an authorized disconnect and not the driver trying to bypass the system. It’s quite an ordeal to go thru… not the physical disconnect of the unit… that’s easy…but, the information you have to know to prove that you are actually a repair shop when it comes to properly disconnecting the unit. With that over with, I can get back to diagnosing the problem at hand. It turned out to be a bad starter motor. I called the parts warehouse and got prices on a replacement starter for the owner. Later that day the owner called back and said they had just put a starter on so I must be mistaken. …..yea, they did, but it was one of those “discount” brands…..the type that offer a life time warranty…..life time warranty, right a lifetime of changing it. (Note: cheap parts = cheap results)

Instead of getting a name brand part they wanted to replace the starter with another “cheap” brand. Ah yes, the cheapo repair part syndrome, repairing your car with your wallet not with wrenches...

She came for the old starter and sometime later showed up with the replacement starter. I informed the owner that since you have decided on the quality of the part but the quality of my diagnostics hasn’t changed, however if it fails to start for any reason beyond the bolts falling out of the starter do to the fact that I forgot to tighten them up… it’s an all new diagnostic charge to rework the test… which I have no doubt it will end up back to this cheap starter. It’s your choice, just warning you that I can’t trust these cheap parts to perform like good quality parts… “You get what you pay for,” I told her.

It went in one ear and out the other. She answer me, “Ok, can ya have it done today?” Whatever, fine, I’ll put it on…. To my surprise……it worked. The next thing was to rewire the breath machine back into the system. No problems there, everything is in working order.

Enough said about the repair….the next thing was….. Close out the ticket in the front office. That’s when old Grandpa showed up with one hell of a chip on his shoulder. (I think old Grandpa threw back a few before he showed up too.)

“You’re charges are higher than the tire shop,” he said angrily, “I don’t think I should have to pay that much for it if the other shop could have done it for less.”

I informed him that my prices were discussed before the job was even done and the price was OK’d before we even started. Besides, the tire shop may have a lower labor cost but, they also said they didn’t have the necessary skills to actually make the proper diagnosis and or the repair.

He rambled on about how he had fixed cars when he was younger and knew a lot about them He would have fixed it himself if he knew what was wrong with it. Aha! The old “if I knew what was wrong with it” scheme. Now we are on to something. So it’s not so much…what I did or how I did it…. It was “knowing” how and what I did .

Seems I’m not doing my job right, maybe I should just start guessing at the repairs…. Maybe then I could lower the cost of the repairs then I could be like the tire shop…. Or maybe I should just throw a dart at a bulletin board full of pictures of parts and where ever it hits that’s the part I change… or better yet, I’ll send it to someone else who knows how fix it. Oh, wait a minute ….that’s how I ended up with it. Oh that’s right…..I’m the guy who is supposed to be the guy that supposed to fix it for the guy. Guess that’s why I get paid the big bucks.

Sorry Grandpa, maybe I’m doing you a big favor… you spend a few bucks with me, that way you’ll be a few bucks shy of that next 6 pack. That might keep you or your tube blowin’ granddaughter from getting behind the wheel drunk and I might actually be preventing a future fatal accident. So do me a favor…. Save some of that hot air for the breath machine Mr., you’ll need it to start the car….